What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
i hate when i lose my white friends in the snow and my black friends in the dark. where do i lose my friends from Afghanistan? in an explosion
what do you call 6 gay men in WWII
Rainbow Six Siege
We need more women in the military! They can bleed for weeks and still not die!
I'll never forget my grandma's last words, "What are you doing in here with that hammer?"
look in the mirror there's a joke for you
Why is 10 afraid because it is in the middle of 9/11
Look, im innocent. I was just going on vacation in NY. But my co-polit said: hit it with ur best shot.
What do polish people in 🇵🇱 Poland use chop sticks for? tweezers
Sometimes I just wake up in the morning, and think well better luck next time.
Got into a fight last night. We both had blades. He cut me deep. I thought I was gone, but he forgot to keep the water running.
Weird thing was that we were in the fight of our lives in the restroom and that guy kinda look like me.
What’s ten feet long and bald
The conga line in the cancer ward
Woman one: I got so mad at my GPS today that I told it to go to hell! Woman two: Did that work? Woman one: Well, it took me to my in-laws’ house.
What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bath tub? One's got hope in her soul, the others got soap in her hole.
I met a guy in a wheelchair today. His face was battered and bruised. "What happened to your face?" I asked.
"I'm a Paralympian," he replied.
"Boxing?"
"No, ... hurdles."
I lost my black friend in the shadows. I lost my white friend on the wall. I lost my Asian friend in the sand and I lost my Islamic friend in the bombings.
What's the most expensive haircut in the world ? Chemotherapy
What's a Mexican's least favorite lesson in art? Drawing border lines.
Why doesn't Barbie ever get pregnant? Because Ken comes in a different box!
Who are the fastest readers? The victims of 9/11. They went through 87 stories in 10 seconds.
