Immigration

Immigration jokes

An ICE agent tells a Mexican that he can get his green card if he can use green, pink, and yellow correctly in a sentence. The Mexican thinks for a minute and says, "My phone goes green, green, and I pink it up and say yellow."

For all the talk of Donald Trump loving America, most of his lovers are imported from Eastern Europe.

How can a person from Alabama tell that someone is an illegal immigrant?

If they are dating someone that isn't related to them.

I may not be as "rich" as Donald Trump, but at least I am still allowed to go on holiday to Bali, Niagara Falls, Hong Kong, and the Pyramids of Giza.

Orange Jesus can't travel to these places because these places cannot grant entry to felons.

...ah, who am I kidding? It's likely that Trump is going to prison, anyway.

"Dude, can you believe Republicans are opposed to homosexuality, women's rights, and immigration, yet they are silent when it comes to incest and child molestation?"

"Well, I'm not surprised. Republicans have to win the Alabama vote, or else."

I seriously don't get why people in Alabama are angered that Mexican immigrants are taking their jobs. I mean, it's not like they are preventing your son from giving you a big, fat blow job.

Why are Alabamians so resentful of immigrants?

They don't want their sons and daughters to have sex with anyone other than their siblings or relatives.

Why can’t you play Uno with Mexicans?

Because they’ll steal all the green cards.

Why can’t you play Uno with Mexicans?

Because they steal all the green cards!

Why can't Mexicans play Uno? Because they're too busy stealing all the green cards.