Why did the mop lick the floor of the bathroom? Because it was so poopy.
"I used to be addicted to soap, but I'm clean now."
How do you embarrass an archaeologist?
Give him a tampon and ask him what period it came from.
If you drink hand sanitizer, does it only kill 99.9% of you?...........💀
What do hockey players and Surrey girls have in common?
They both only change their pads after every third period!
With numerous reports of Donald Trump's odor and Kelly Clarkson's lack of hygienic habits... proof that money doesn't buy cleanliness.
Your mom is so fat that she cannot look at her feet when taking a shower.
Yo mama so poor that when she went to KFC, she had to lick other people's fingers.
Yo mama so disgusting that when she took a shower, the water turned into ditchwater.
Yo mama so disgusting, she hangs toilet paper to dry after she wiped with them.
I wanted to take a bath, but decided to leave it where it is.
What should you do to prevent dry skin? Use a towel.
What do you give the dentist of the year? A little plaque.
How do mice floss their teeth? With string cheese.
A Japanese man goes to the dentist. After being there for a while, the dentist asks, "How often do you floss your teeth?"
The Jap said, "After every meal." When they finish up, the dentist turns to him and says, "You need to floss your eyes more. I can still see them."
You got no lotion to masturbate, then you remember there's some leftover porridge in the fridge. 😌🤎😇
I was trying to make homemade baby powder until I realized it isn't made from babies, oops wrong ingredient... smh
I bet when you take a bath, they give you the whole pool. No, better yet, the ocean!
The way you are so ugly your parents even regret the day you were born.
The way you are so black when your mom is bathing you in the dark, she has to put flour in the water to see you.
🤣🤣🤣
I wish you were a soap, because I want you all over me.
