Home improvement jokes
How many children does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw.
Why was the dog stealing shingles?
He wanted to be a woofer.
Nobody really liked our fireplace.
So I turned it into a brick pizza oven. Idk why, but now everyone likes our fireplace.
My water was leaking, so I used Flex Tape. Now I don't know where to shower. Thanks, Phil!
A friend took me out to his shed and was showing me all his tools, when he pointed to a ladder. "That's my step ladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."
My friend was showing me his tool shed and pointed to a ladder. "That's my stepladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."
Today I'm attaching a light to the ceiling, but I'm afraid I'll probably screw it up.
One thing led to another, now I have a new patio.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
My water was leaking, so I used Flex Tape. Now I don't know where to shower.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
Depends how hard you can throw them.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them. XD
When Bob the Builder looks at your hairline, he says, "We can't fix that."
My Xbox has been acting up lately... So I painted it black to make it run faster.
What story does an orphan always get kicked out of? Home Depot.
I have a stepladder. My real ladder left for milk and never came back.
My ceiling isn't the best... But it's up there!