Hole jokes
Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms?
They'll fall right through his hands.
What kind of file turns a 5mm hole into a 3cm hole?
A pedo-file.
Yo mama so stupid, when I said, "Go deep," she dug a hole in the field.
What’s the easiest way to dig a hole to China?
Through my arm.
How do you catch a polar bear?
Cut a hole in the ice, put peas around it, when the polar bear goes to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole.
A Catholic gay male that is well-endowed goes to confession, and while he is inside the confessional booth, the Catholic priest is sucking his dick, and he says to the Catholic priest, "What are you doing, Father?"
And the priest says, "It's called giving a blowjob."
And the Catholic gay male says, "Why are you giving me a blowjob, Father, inside the confessional booth?"
And the Catholic priest says, "If there was no glory hole in the confessional booth, my son, it would not be called a confessional booth in the first place."
Student: Hey! Did you hear the joke about the three holes in the ground?
Teacher: No?
Student: All I can say about it is, "Well, well, well."
How do you make a body disappear?
You use an axe, black plastic bags, a forest, a shovel, and some ice cream because killing someone and chopping them up and digging holes in the ground and putting dirt over them is a lot of hard work!
P.S., I'm joking and don't condone these actions.
What’s the difference between 69 and High School?
In 69 you usually only kiss one c*nt and look at one a**hole.
Dad joke.
Why does a dad get more than a pair of socks at the golf course?
Because of a hole in one!
A man went hunting with his son and shot an animal.
The father asks the son to identify the animal he just shot, and the son answers: "Holy Cow!"
Father: "What do you mean, 'Holy Cow?'"
Son: "You shot a hole in the cow, of course!"
What does a ripped jacket and a golfer have in common?
They both have a hole in one.
Why are 10-pin bowlers always in pain?
Because their balls have holes in them.
Dad: Boy, come sit in this hole while I brace the ground.
Boy: I don't want to see Grandpa, he scares me!
Chuck: Do you have holes in your underpants?
Teacher: No, of course not.
Chuck: Then how do you get your feet through?
Did you know that lots of graves are put in churchyards?
Yeah, they're pretty holey.
Why can’t you take an Asian guy golfing? Because you can’t drive. Every time he does, he tries to put a hole-in-one.
Why is there only a glory hole in the handicapped stall in some public men's restrooms?
Because a gay man that is not physically handicapped can't receive a blow job from a gay man that is physically handicapped under the handicapped stall.
A hunter shot holes into his favorite book.
When confronted, he said it was the "holey" Bible!
Why does Adolf hate golf?
He ended up in the bunker.