HI jokes

TJ's hairline is so far back his friends don't even want to talk to his ugly ass!

A man is on his deathbed in prison by electric chair.

The man who controls the chair asks for any last words.

The prisoner replies with: “Can you hold my hand?”

If Kobe missed a shot, his helicopter will too.

One day this kid says to his dad, "Dad, they bully me at school."

His dad asks why, and the kid says, "They bully me because I got no hands."

Then his dad says, "Who would do such a thing like that? I want to know who they are. Point at them!"

Q: How do you know when Putin is lying?

A: His lips move.

You know, the strangest things happen. My mom said, "Step on a crack, you break your mama's back, but if you step on a line, you break your father's spine." I stepped on the line. It didn't break his spine. Mom, who is my father?

Jack and Jill went up a hill to do it in the water.

Jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a daughter.

Hi! Could I join?

Umm, Tyrone did not get his chicken.

His gay ass dad.

A boy's hairline is always in the back of his head, and its shape is like a check mark.

Bro, the Twin Towers are like my grandpa and his friends. One survived—my grandpa. The others have fallen—his friends.

What does a storm cloud wear under his raincoat? Thunderwear.

Hi, I’m Joe.

When you're watching "Gnomeo and Juliet 2" and your dad walks in on the gnome shaking his butt.

Why did the kid cross the road?

Because he wasn't wearing his seat belt! 😂

A man went hunting with his son and shot an animal.

The father asks the son to identify the animal he just shot, and the son answers: "Holy Cow!"

Father: "What do you mean, 'Holy Cow?'"

Son: "You shot a hole in the cow, of course!"

I look at an orphanage, then hug my mum. He just looks sad and crude because he couldn’t find his mum.

I've been drinking from a tall cup.

His teeth look like Twin Towers, Al-Qaeda blown him up.

Did you see that car crash today where the guy got the entire left side of his body cut off?

He's all right now.