Genesis jokes
Yo momma so old, she was at Cain and Abel's baby shower.
If Eve sacrificed the human race for an apple, what would she do for a Klondike bar?
Adam and Eve had 3 male children, the only children on Earth. How did they reproduce?
Who was the first carpenter?
Eve, she made Adam's banana stand...
What did Eve say to Adam?
"That is rock hard."
Yo mama so black, when God saw her, he said, "Let there be light!" but twice.
Yo hairline so far back, it oversaw the creation of the earth!
God: Ok, so I created adults. And I created how they are supposed to look from being born to preteen.
Satan: (slides in) I’ll take over for you, pops.
God: I dunno... this is very delicate work. Just one wrong thing can ruin the system.
Satan: Don’t worry your beard off! (Pats his back) I’ll just do the ages from 12 to 18!
God: Hmm... I’m still not- (Gets a call on his phone) Shoot, I got to take this. (Answers call) Don’t touch anything, Lucifer! (Walks away)
Satan:.......(just touches lightly, and alarms start blaring. He squeaks and runs away)
God: (rushes in) WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!?!
God: (tries fixing problems. Only gets alarms off) Fuck me........
God:....(sighs) Fine, it’ll stay. We’ll just call it....puberty.
God made Adam and Eve have sex right out the gate.
Then he made teenagers horny... yet here we are with a so-called "rise in teen pregnancy."
Before the chicken or the egg, there was only Chuck Norris.
We have life. I hope we have life. We have God in Jesus Christ. This is a good thing. It is a song part.
You were born out of your dad.
Community talk
Hey Julie, heard you got that wet, wet, wet Something for my neck, neck, neck Hey Julie, heard you got that drip, got that drip Something for my wrist, for my wrist Hey Julie Ooh, hey Julie Yeah, hey Julie, heard you got that drip, drip, drip, drip Yeah, something for my wrist, wrist, wrist, wrist Paparazzi sound like flick, flick, flick, flick (Flick flick, flick flick) Nikon, I'm an Icon like Will Smith kid, yeah M… Read more
Songs you NEED to listen to!
Velvet Ring - Big Theif Genesis - Grimes Brakhage - Stereolab Jump the Turnstile - TV Girl, Jordana Partyisntover/Campfire/Bimmer- Tyler, The Creator
GENESIS 45 Joseph Makes Himself Known 1Then Joseph could no longer control himself before all his attendants, and he cried out, “Have everyone leave my presence!” So there was no one with Joseph when he made himself known to his brothers. 2And he wept so loudly that the Egyptians heard him, and Pharaoh’s household heard about it. 3Joseph said to his brothers, “I am Joseph! Is my father still living?” But his brothers… Read more