I was born and raised in Newcastle.
My grandfather used to tell me stories about Penaldo, a goblin from Portugal that travels to England when Newcastle is playing. He scores a tapin and then disappears until the next Newcastle game. I still have nightmares that he’s in our stadium.
Q: Why can't orphans be on a football team?
A: Because they won't know where to go on a home game.
When the quiet kid lost a game of basketball and reaches into his bag,
other people in the gym: "Oh shit this nigga bout to shoot."
Why can't orphans play poker?
Because they don't know what a full house is.
My friend threw a soccer ball at a disabled kid.
We all yelled "Rocket league!"
"You did great!"
"Come here and get your prize, a shiny quarter!"
"Nah, that's okay."
"Here's the quarterback."
"You don't want the quarter?"
"No! Quarterback!"
"Huh?"
(Crashes) (screams)
"Yo, sorry 'bout that."
"You think he's gonna be mad?"
"Who? Baldi?"
"Nah, he doesn't have a HAIR in the world!"
(Annoying Orange laughs) (Baldi groans)
Why cant orphans play games parents sig
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome trying to beat Minecraft?
“A sped runner.”
How do you keep a blind kid entertained?
You take him to a stadium crowd, then give him a bat and tell him to hit the piñata.
What does an Irish bowler put in his hands to guarantee a wicket next ball?
A bat.
What did the spectator miss when going to the toilet?
The entire English innings.
Are you a Pikachu?
Because you are SHOCKINGLY beautiful!
Pokemon
You must be a Charmander. Because you’re making me hot.
Pokemon.
If there's ever a shooting at school, pull out an Uno reverse card.
Pokemon: What do you call a killer that uses psycho powers?
Mr. Mime!
Why shouldn’t you do drugs? Weedle make you high.
How can Pikachu make a baby laugh? By playing pika-boo!
What do you call a Pokémon who can’t move very fast?
A Slowpoke.
How can you tell a Pokémon likes baseball?
Every night he turns into a Golbat.
Which Pokémon do soccer players like the most?
GOALduck.
