Freeway

Freeway jokes

Pope

    • One day, the Pope is coming to America in his limo, and he said to the driver, "Why don’t you let me drive for once?"

    The driver thinks to himself, "Well, I can’t say no to this guy; he’s the Pope." So the driver pulls over, and they change places. The Pope was having fun, hauling butt down the freeway, dogging cars. After a while, the driver taps on the window and tells the Pope, "Slow down a bit; you might get pulled over."

    The Pope says, "Ahhh, don’t worry about it; I’m the Pope." So he rolls up the window and continues to drive very fast. After a few moments, he gets pulled over. The cop walks to the car, and the Pope rolls down the tinted window. The cop sees the Pope and says, "Oh, I, ehhh, sorry, can you hold on a minute?"

    The Pope says, "Sure." The cop walks back to his car and radios back to the station. He says, "Guys, I just pulled over someone really important."

    They ask who, "The President?"

    "No, more important."

    "The president of another country?"

    "No, more important."

    "An ambassador?"

    "No, even more important."

    "Well, who is it?"

    "I don’t know, but the Pope is the chauffeur."

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    • Animal

    • One time, me and the bois got drunk and we were on the freeway...

    ...when the road was closed because a wild animal species named “The Cult” was on the loose.

    Freeway memes

    Man

    • Worst jokes ever? More like I killed an old man in 2012 in Oklahoma City at that nasty Red Lobster, not the one near the freeway, and hid the body in a creek!

    Man

    • What did the man who had sex with an Instagram model in the reverse cowgirl position while going 90 on the freeway get charged for?

    Driving under the influencer.

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    • Road

    • Americans: We drive on the right side of the road.

    The British: We drive on the left side of the road.

    Russia: ROAD IS ROAD. *crashing noises follow*

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    • Transportation

    • It’s disappointing that Los Angeles doesn’t offer better transportation, especially since my neighbor offers free mustache rides every night.

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    • Nun

    • A cop pulls over a carload of nuns.

    The cop says, "Sister, this is a 55 MPH highway. Why are you going so slow?"

    The Sister replies, "Sir, I saw a lot of signs that said 41, not 55."

    The cop answers, "Oh, Sister, that's not the speed limit, that's the name of the highway you are on!"

    The Sister says, "Oh! Silly me! Thanks for letting me know. I'll be more careful."

    At this point, the cop looks in the backseat where the other nuns are shaking and trembling. The cop asks, "Excuse me, Sister, what's wrong with your friends back there? They are shaking something terrible."

    The Sister answers, "We just got off Highway 101."

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