Fired jokes
How do you make a cat sound like a dog?
You set it on fire; then it goes, "WOOF!"
Where was Stephen Hawking during the house fire?
The top of the stairs.
Chuck Norris can make a fire with two ice cubes.
On the inside of a fire hydrant you'll find H2O. What's on the outside? K9P.
Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day.
Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
Why was the man fired from a calendar factory? He took a day off.
I've just been fired from the clock-making factory after all those extra hours I put in.
What is black and sits at the top of the stairs? -- Steven Hawking after a house fire.
When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat children into the fire.
Chuck Norris uses elevators only in case of fire.