Final Jokes

If aliens were real

Then orphans would finally have a home

Why did sally fail her final exam?

Because she had nothing written down.

So there are these 3 strings, they walk into a bar. People are giving them looks. The small chap is your typical thin cord. He walks to the barman and asks for a rum and coke. He replies, "Oii, your kind ain't welcomed here so take your drink, mates and fuck off." He goes back to his mates and says, "We'd better get outta here." "Nonsense." replies the mid guy, he's your typical string. Goes to the barman and same story. Finally the last guy, He's your typical rope. He burst out, "Fuck this!". He twits and ties himself whilst messing up his hair. He struts up to the barman and asks for a rum and coke. The barman does so and whilst he prepares the drink he opens with, "Say aren't you a string?" "No, I'm a frayed knot."

Two Trojan warriors were patrolling the streets of Troy at night. It was finally time for their duties to be relived. When they went back to their houses, one Trojan fell in a puddle. Nitrogen! The other called. And the other responded coldly, “Good nigh-“

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

I wa finally released from jail a year after I beat up someone on New Year’s Eve. Don’t blame me for being suspicious of an Arabian counting down from ten.

Hey dad are you finally back with the milk dad: yea but it's expired so ima go back to the ''milk store'' and get more (and not come back for a couple more years). :)

Jesus saved me from eternal fate. But I didn't want to get saved I was about to fight Satan on Final Destination before facing and kicking God's ass.

A father came to his daughters 18th birthday he finally came

How is an emo kid’s wrist like Pink Floyd? It’s all shitty until you reach the final cut.

On the plus side, I finally hear voices talking to me... just wish they outside my head

Sister:Hey sis how are you today?Me:Oh good you?sister:good cause i heard you finally got a good living life

VOTING FINAL This vote is for the best School Shooter joke of the month. - LIKE: When the school shooter is about to leave your classroom and the autistic kid’s sketchers light up. DISLIKE: When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say “This boy always had a fat ass”.

Vote for the better joke and the Joke of the Month will be announced in the comments tomorrow.

There was a boy in the gym who was in his late teens. He was sitting at the dumbells tables but he wasn't lifting. He instead, sat up and was ripping something up. The manager then walked over to him, and asked "You're hogging the dumbells, dude! What are you even doing?" The boy hesitated, then said "Getting ripped, wanna join me?" as he held up stacks of blank paper. The man silently sat on the table with him and grabbed some papers. "Why not?" he finally said.