Fat People jokes

Fat people are thirsty, so I piss in their mouth.

Tech administrator of a school: Hm, a message from Google security?

Tech administrator of a school: OH SHIT!

Assistant: WHAT, WHAT, TELL ME?

Tech administrator of a school: WE'VE BEEN COMPROMISED, WE FORGOT TO SECURE THE SITE!

Assistant: OK, OK, THE KEY IS NOT TO PANIC... let's call the school board.

A FEW MOMENTS LATER

Head of school board: HAHAHAHAHAHA! That's a good one, almost as good as the one with Jack, Jill, and the ripped condom! HAHAHAHAHAHA

Tech administrator of a school: HAHAHA yeah I know right *whispers* you are playing it cool, right?

Head of school board: *whispers* yeah we're fucked...

TWO HOURS LATER

Important fat people in one room: OH FUCK OH NO, HELP PLEASE!!!!! WAIT, HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO TELL THE PARENTS ABOUT THEIR STOLEN INFORMATION!!!

AND SO THAT WAS THE BIRTH OF RIOTING TEACHER

I know five fat people, and you're three of them.

When fat people smash, it must feel like a huge submarine hitting you.

My question is, how do fat people fit in tuxedos? Honestly, don’t wear those. Wear your regular clothes. Your belly is just gonna pop out!

Yesterday, I saw an advert with a random woman dancing, and someone said that they were beautiful.

And then I said, "Except the fat people." And then I got sent to my room for saying that.

How many fat people are in my house?

20, counting the kids in the basement.

Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn't last as long for fat people.