Wife: I will leave you if you call me fat again. Husband: Wait dear.. Don’t do it for the sake of our kid! Wife: Kid? Husband: Yeah, aren’t you pregnant?
What is the worst thing your sibling can steal from you? Your virginity
I PUT THE FUN IN DYSFUNCTIONAL
Son: Dad, I think I got a girl pregnant. Dad: well is she already part of the family? Son: Yes, why? Dad: then there’s no need to be worried.
Knock, knock. (Whose there?) Your dad. (But my dads dead.) I know, just reminding you!
I asked my mom if I can help her out with the cooking, she answered yes. A few hours later dinner was ready and dad came to join. Mother said “honey can you get the mashed potatoes” dad said “why she’s right here”
Does a migit count as a orphan?
why can't orphans walk through door because they don't have a house to walk into
When some one says your adopted say “ But your still at the orphanage.”
son: Dad i know i’m adopted dad: well how do you know son: i found the adoption papers dad: that is for your mum
if you know you know
i just wanted to say to never let go of family they are everything never let anyone walk all over you and if you are with me like this quote
son: can i go to my friends mum? mum: no! son: dad was right i am a son of a bitch! mum: bad news but your adopted!!
alcholics don't run in my family, they drive
my sisters pregnant, ima be a dad!
My enemy told me I’m adopted so I told him at at least I got adopted
I was gonna say when you were born your mum saw you and screamed but I remembered you were adopted...
My grandma used to beat the hell out of me for coming home late.. Guess who's late now..
