Family jokes
Why can’t an orphan play baseball? Because they can’t find home.
Well, I'm off to the orphanage to tell yo mama jokes.
How do orphans have a family reunion? They look in the mirror.
I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home, there were signs everywhere.
Guess what? If your mom ever wants to have sex with you, tell her to make another.
Sally's mother had four children. The fourth April, the second May, the third June. Who was the first child?
Sally.
Why can’t orphans go on field trips?
They need a parent's signature.
They don't have parents because they left when you were 0.
My depressed mom looks good hanging from a tree.
When it's April Fool's Day, go to an orphan and say, "Their parents should come back!"
Why can’t an orphan celebrate Father’s Day and Mother’s Day? Because they have no parents.
Why can't an orphan play Family Feud? Because it has to have a family.
One day I was walking around, then saw this mom mad at her kid and screamed, "You're adopted!" He said, "Yeah, I know. My REAL mommy is still at home with daddy."
What is the difference between a tree and "walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk home"?
Was your birthday?
I love my family.
Why can orphans not grow big and strong? Because they need a parent to buy them steroids.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Why does an orphan not play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
There was once a kid named Timmy. His father and mother went to bed one night and didn't hear or see Timmy come with them.
They all get under the covers. Timmy, still unnoticed, looks under the covers and lets out a blood-curdling scream. "MOMMY, WATCH OUT! THERE IS A SNAKE GOING INTO YOUR BIG BLACK HAIRY BUSH!" And he proceeds to say, "DON'T WORRY MOMMY, I'LL GET IT!" And he takes his father's penis in his mouth and chomps down.
Now I want you to think what their breakfast conversation was the next morning.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't find home plate.