Documentary Jokes

A Canadian, an American and a Mexican were tasked by a billionaire with teaching his stubborn pet parrot how to speak within 2 weeks.

They were given everything they needed to succeed and a large sum of money was offered to the one who made the parrot talk first.

The Canadian played documentaries for the parrot through the whole duration, he spent all his time citing the alphabet and reading stories for the parrot.

The American showered him with the finest food, brought him all the females that he can mate with and made sure to spoil the parrot as much as he can.

The Mexican locked the parrot in a dark room, barely gave him any food or water and beat the shit out of him every single day.

When the time was up, the billionaire returned to find the parrot still unable to speak, so he asked the 3 trainers about their progress.

The Canadian goes: "I have tried everything, I spent all my time and energy teaching him the alphabet and reading books to him! Nothing worked."

The American agrees: "I have spoiled him beyond belief, gave him all the luxury he can possibly get and yet he won't speak!".

The Mexican confirms: "I have showered him with love and luxury as well, tried to teach him words day and night, spent all my time and energy spoiling him with everything I had!"

The parrot looks at the Mexican with disbelief and yells out: "You lying motherfucker!".

Would it be wrong of me to yell “Jenga!” or “Timber!” while my class is watching a 9/11 documentary?

There's a new Michael Jackson biopic in the works. There is a possibility that we will know who his love interest was.

What we know so far: Billie Jean is not his lover, and that kid [seen with him] is not his son. We also know that Michael Jackson said that sharing his bed with little boys is "healing" and an act of "sharing the love", so take that as you will.

I just watched a documentary about Adolf Hitler.

He sure was a popular guy. Everywhere he went, people shouted “Hi Hitler” and gave him a little wave.

Someone in my class yell jenga well watching a documentary about the twin towers

We where watching a 9/11 documentary in class and I said "Man they are really bad at Jenga"

I got kicked out of Social Studies class when my teacher made us watch a women's rights documentary. When he asked us what the genre of the film was, I put my hand up and said "Fiction".

We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class. I started playing the angry birds theme song. That didn't fly well with people, the teacher yelled at me like an bomb, and I landed on the ground

People were deciding how to punish a terrible criminal and one man came up with a great idea. He sat him in a movie theater with no food at all and made him watch a 12 hour documentary about the country Hungary

When the guy next to you says that he kind of agrees with the villain.

Me watching a World War 2 documentary.

me: "the villain has a point you know"

everyone else watching the WW2 documentary:

I watched a documentary called Redline Carrera: birth of the memes. It all started with Paul Walker.

Watching the 9/11 documentaries just watching a kill cam

this kid yelled jenga when we were watching a 9 11 documentary.

I was watching a documentary about how storks carry babies from their previous life to the next.

In his old life Michael Jackson must’ve been a teddy bear. The storks let him play with kids for a change.

I screamed "Jenga" today in class while watching a 9/11 documentary.

I was excited to finally watch the new documentary on Netflix. It was about Pessi’s UberEats career. In the trailer Pessi delivered food to French farmers. I watched the documentary and got shocked when I found out how finished Pessi is. He delivered one Pizza in 44 attempts.