Dis jokes
What did grandpa say before he died in the hospital bed?
"Boy, could you put my phone on charging?"
The real reason Stephen Hawking died is because he tried to overclock his wheelchair.
What is the difference between Sir Isaac Newton and the baby I just stabbed?
Sir Isaac Newton died a virgin.
Where do you take Stephen Hawking when he dies?
The Apple repair store.
The reason Stephen Hawking died is because he drove too far from the wall. The cord unplugged.
Memes
Did Jesus die a virgin?
Of course not, he got nailed before he died!
Has anyone alive ever died?
Is this our eternal life?
Hitler was the most handsome man alive.
Everyone died for him.
Me testing if there is fall damage in real life (falls off of a cliff, uses water bucket trick) dies.
You shouldn't joke about 9/11. My grampa died on 9/11. He was the best pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.
Me: Knock knock.
My Grandma: Whoβs there?
Me: Interrupting cow.
My Grandma: Interrupting c-
[Dies from heart attack]
I asked the emo kid if they get jealous when their phone dies.
What do you call Darth Vader when he dies?
A black alien.
My dad died in the attacks. He was the best pilot Pakistan has ever seen, Allahu Akbar!
Yo mama is so fat that a whole forest grew on her, but it was sad because she really smells, so the forest died.
What do the people in heaven that died on the Titanic call the Titanic? The Dietanic.
Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies.
One of my family members died on 9/11, he was one of the best pilots in the Middle East.
I'll never forget my aunt's last words before she died: "Can you stop shaking the ladder, please?"
Levon Aronian's wife died in a car crash. That's wheelie unfortunate.