"My grandmother used to tell us a joke. She’d say 'Knock knock,' we’d say 'Who’s there?.' Then she’d say 'I can’t remember'... and start to cry."
An american is touring the Soviet union. A russian takes him to a school so he can see what its like. He asks the kids if they like the Soviet Union. All of the kids say yes they love it. All but one. That kid bursts out crying. The american asks whats wrong and he cries "I want to live in the Soviet Union!"
I helped my son (who is missing his arms) unwrap his christmas present ungrateful bastard just sits there and cries, and it's a pair of mittens. the ungrateful bastard is just sitting there, crying.
Why did potassium draw a tear that would consult in him crying?
Because all of his friends argon
What is the difference between a washing machine and a child..?
The washing machine doesn't cry when you put a load in it.
What’s red and cries? A skinned baby in a bag of salt.
Robin asks Batman what are you getting your parents for Christmas Batman gets mad slaps Robin and runs off crying
now you know why Batman beyond was born when Bruce died cause of death: suicide
Why did the sea cry ? Because it felt salty and blue
I got my little girl a hand sewing kit for her birthday and she cried. I didn't understand why until I realized that she had no hands to sew with.
Little girls cry. Big girls say FU*K.
Three women were in heaven. The angel at the gates said, "How good the ride into heaven is for you, is determined by your commitment to your most recent partner." The first lady says, "2 years, 2 side-hoes." She got an old lexus. The second lady says, "10 years, 1 visit from a prostitute." She got a Mercedes-Benz. The third lady says, "I never had a husband." The angel says in response, "F*ck me and then you can have a lambo." They all arrive in heaven, to see the second lady crying. The first lady says, "I know we are dead, but it could be a lot worse." "How!?" The third lady cries, "The angel has a flute for a d*ck!"
Q: what is the difference between a pizza and a baby? A: the pizza does not scream when you put it in the oven.
A man walks into a forest and sees a girl crying he asks her what is wrong? She replies I lost my, my family, my friends and my home the man then unties his pants and says then young lady ur day is about to get worse
What do you do when a baby starts to cry. You use more lube
Idk why my blind kid is crying. but I think it could be the tacks I put on the couch.
You'd think my son would be happy that Daddy bought him a new bike. But no... oh no he just sits in his wheelchair and cries like a little girl.
A man was kneeling on the church floor, crying desperately in front of the large wooden statue of Christ. "My headphones are broken, Lord... I'm desperate... What should I do? Guide me!!" And the Lord appeared in the form of bright light, and the strong, deep voice filled the man's soul. WELL BUY NEW ONES, YOU DUMBASS And so he did.
What is the difference between a refrigerator and a baby, The refigerator dosent cry when i put my meat in it
Little Jonny walks in on his parents having sex. He asks what their doing and the father says: "Well...We're making you a brother." So little Jonny runs off to let his parents finish, happy that he's going to have a brother soon. The next day when little Jonny's father comes come Jonny is crying out on the driveway. The father sits down next to Jonny and asks what's wrong. Jonny cries: "I won't have a baby brother!" HIs father is confused. "What do you mean?" He asks. "Because the mailman came by today and ate him!"
Pete: Knock Knock... Paul: Who's there? Pete: Boo... Paul: Boo who? Pete: Don't cry it was only a joke! Paul: I'm going to cry! It was such a bad joke!!!
