You'd think my son would be happy that Daddy bought him a new bike. But no... oh no he just sits in his wheelchair and cries like a little girl.
A man was kneeling on the church floor, crying desperately in front of the large wooden statue of Christ. "My headphones are broken, Lord... I'm desperate... What should I do? Guide me!!" And the Lord appeared in the form of bright light, and the strong, deep voice filled the man's soul. WELL BUY NEW ONES, YOU DUMBASS And so he did.
What is the difference between a refrigerator and a baby, The refigerator dosent cry when i put my meat in it
Little Jonny walks in on his parents having sex. He asks what they're doing and the father says: "Well...we're making you a brother." So little Jonny runs off to let his parents finish, happy that he's going to have a brother soon.
The next day when little Jonny's father comes home, Jonny is crying out on the driveway. The father sits down next to Jonny and asks what's wrong. Jonny cries: "I won't have a baby brother!" His father is confused. "What do you mean?" he asks. "Because the mailman came by today and ate him!"
Pete: Knock Knock... Paul: Who's there? Pete: Boo... Paul: Boo who? Pete: Don't cry it was only a joke! Paul: I'm going to cry! It was such a bad joke!!!
A man is walking on the deck of a cruise ship, when he sees a woman, without arms and legs, crying. The man says "What's wrong?" The woman says "I've never been hugged before." So, the man gives her a hug and walks away.
The next day, the man sees the woman, on the deck, crying again. The man says "What's wrong, now?" The woman says "I've never been kissed before." So, the man gives her a kiss and walks away.
The next day, the same thing occurs. The man says "Oh, for Christ's sake! What's wrong, this time?!" The woman says "Well, I've never been fucked before." So, the man picks her up, throws her into the ocean, and yells "YOU'RE FUCKED!"
Why was the boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.
My sister thinks she's so smart. She said, "Onions are the only food that makes you cry." So I threw a coconut at her.
What's the difference between a school bus and my Dad's van?
School buses usually don't have screaming and crying children.
"I bought my little sister a trampoline for her birthday, but all she wants to do is sit in her wheelchair and cry."
Papa: Johnny Johnny Johnny: Yes Papa? Papa: Open wide Johnny: HAHAHA Papa: *unzips pants* Johnny: *crying* No Papa
Three men are outside Heaven's gates waiting to go through Heaven. The angel at the gate tells them, "Depending on the length of time and your faithfulness to your last partner decides your way across the bridge to Heaven."
The first guy says, "I was with my wife for 5 years and cheated 3 times." The angel gives him an old model pick up. The second guy says, "11 years and only once," and is granted a Mercedes.
The last man says, "20 years and not once. I loved her with all my heart," and with the angel impressed, he gets a gold edition Lamborghini and sets off ahead of the other two men. Hours later, the two men catch up to him crying behind the wheel and one says, "I know we are dead, but it could be much worse."
The guy looks up and says, "How! I just went past my wife on a skateboard!"
Your mama so ugly she make the devil cry.
Whats red, 6 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I feed it to her ?
Her miscarriage
My friend said onions only cry so that’s why I threw a coconut at him
What's the difference between a man and a table. The table doesn't cry when I break it's legs
So a orphon was crying in a corner in the dark. Then a man came over and asked why are you crying?
Then said do you want me to get your parents.
Why did the octopus cry ? Because his mum said he looked like Johnny Depp
When I was young I got bullied by two kids, and whenever I got hit to the ground, I would get back up and cry. Then I had the courage to fight back. Except they didn't get back up.
Cats are like onions, when I cut them I crie.
