Croak jokes

A grandfather is on his rocking chair. His grandson comes to him and asks him to croak, to which the grandfather responds with a "no". His granddaughter then comes along and asks him to croak, to which the grandfather responds, "Why do you keep asking me to croak?" The granddaughter replies, "Because Dad says if you do, we get to go to Disneyland."

What does a perverted frog say?

"Rubbit."

What do you call a 100-year-old frog?

An old croak!

What’s the difference between a cat and a frog?

A cat has nine lives, and a frog croaks every day.

What did the frog order?

A diet Croak!

What animal has more lives than a cat?

A frog. It croaks every night.

Go commit neck rope.

Guys, this is so wrong. I'm an orphan and this extremely offends me. I'm telling my parents, um.......

I was talking to my Welsh friend the other day, and he suddenly started talking Welsh to me then collapsed after the first few sentences. Turns out he had a stroke.

Me: Hey, are your parents home?

Orphan: (crying) Stop calling here!

Elmo, stop penetrating the orphan!