Wanted to get the scoop on history of ice cream, so I went to Sunday school.
Cream Jokes
Q: Why did Billy drop his ice cream cone?
A: He has turrets.
I sat down to eat some ice cream. The next moment, I screamed!
Yo mama is so dumb, she wanted to get some ice, but she went to Antarctica and actually got ice and brought wilt cream! đ¤Ł
What do rats like on their birthday? Mice cream and cake.
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Because she had no arms."
"Why couldnât she get up off the ground?" "Because she had no friends."
"Knock knock." "Whoâs there?" "Not Susie, sheâs still on the ground."
"Where did Susie go when the bomb went off?" "Everywhere."
"Why couldnât Susie scratch her leg?" "Because it was in a different body bag."
"Why did Susie drop her ice cream?" "She was hit by a bus."
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Someone threw a refrigerator at her."
Ice cream is just like I scream.
Me: Why did the bus drop his ice cream?
Sanity to live: I don't know?
Me: He was run over by Timmy!!!
Sanity to live? *dies*
Me: *At edge of bridge* Wow, sweet view.
Sanity to live: *resurrected*
Narrator: Sometimes a bridge is all you need...
(sponsored by jumping bridges)
A kid asks for an ice cream. The man says, "Any sauce?" and the kid says, "Na, I got ketchup at home."
I like my coffee like I like my women.
Big tits.
Stephen Hawking, more like ice cream!
Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream?
Because he was dead.
Johnny was watching TV when he heard them say "bitch" and "bastard," so he asked his dad, "What is a bitch and bastard?"
Dad said, "A bitch is a female, and a bastard is a male."
Then Johnny goes back to the TV and hears them say "ass" and "shit," so he asks his dad what "shit" and "ass" means. Dad says, "A shit is shaving cream, like what I'm putting on my face, and ass is a coat. Why don't you bug your mom?"
So Johnny goes back to the TV, and then they say "fuck," so Johnny asks his mom what "fuck" means. Mom says, "Fuck means carving, like doing to the turkey." Then a few minutes later, Johnny hears a knock on the door, so he answers it. He then says, "Welcome, bitch and bastard, may I tack your ass?" The people then ask where his parents are. Johnny says, "My dad is putting shit on his face, and my mom is fucking the turkey."
Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?
He got ran over by a bus.
A Down syndrome kid asks for an ice cream. The man asks, "Do you want sauce on it?"
The kid says, "It doesnât matter, Iâm going to drop it anyway!" đđđ
Whatâs worse than dropping your ice cream?
The Holocaust.
Why did the cow go to space?
To get ice cream!
Why did the little girl's ice cream melt?
She was on fire.
Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
A young boy enters a barber shop, and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream parlor.
"Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"
The boy licked his cone and replied:
"Because the day I take the dollar the game is over!"
