“Your ass must be jealous of all that shit that comes out of your mouth.”
You’re Russian when you go to the bathroom and Finnish when you come out. What are you in the bathroom?
European
So, Satan is in the delivery room having a child. Soon, a feathered creature comes out. "Doctor," say Satan. "What is it?" The doctor sighs. "Well, it's not a boy, and it's not a girl." Satan looks frustrated. "THEN WHAT IS IT?!?!?" The doctor looks up. "It's a goose."
Did you know ghosts are alcoholics They only come out for the Booz
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream parlor.
"Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"
The boy licked his cone and replied:
"Because the day I take the dollar the game is over!"
What kind of fish 🐟 comes out at night 🌙?
A starfish.
How do you know when you should tell a heterosexual woman to stop sucking your dick? when there is blood coming out of dick instead of sperm
Imagine Michael Jackson having kids ? Would come out Black or white or plastic 😂
ok this isnt a joke but its funny.
Roses are red, nuts are brown, Skirts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin, when its stiff, stick it in. It goes in dry, comes out wet, the longer it's in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag, its not what you think, its a lipton tea bag.
Get your mind out of the gutter.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They don't have a closet to come out of.
yo mama so old when she farts dust comes out
Why's it so hard to come out of the closet just open the door
Did the sun just come out, or did you just smile at me?
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing diapers!” She replies: “Oh my god! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?” To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
Why did the starwars movies come out 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3? In charge of scheduling, Yoda was.
What is the most noise that comes out of a ladies mouth? Nothing because they never have anything important to say.
If you'r american when you go in the bathroom and you american when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?
European.
I can swallow two pieces of string and when they come out the other end, they'll be tied together. I shit you knot.
I went to the “lists of women” page on wikipedia and it was blank. either, wikipedia is proving w*men do not exist or john cena decided to come out as transgender
A robber breaks into a house while the residents are away one dark night. Eager to see what he can loot, he quickly starts searching through cupboards and dressers, grabbing valuables with a trained eye. Suddenly, he hears a voice come out of nowhere. "Jesus is watching you." The criminal jumps, scared the residents are back, and freezes. After a few minutes of silence however, he assumes it was his imagination, and goes back to robbing. A couple minutes pass, before once again, the voice returns. "Jesus is watching you." Quite confused, the thief searches the house and checks the front door, but nothing pops out as unusual. He finally decides to move rooms, and finds a parrot, but ignores it. Before he can begin to do anything, someone speaks again, "Jesus is watching you." The robber realized it was the parrot talking! Going to the parrot, he asks it, "Are you the one who's been talking to me?" The parrot responds, "Yes." The thief couldn't believe it. So, he asks another question. "What is your name?" "Ismael." the parrot replies. The man scoffed. "What type of idiot names a parrot Ismael?" The parrot speaks yet again, "The same type of idiot that names a Rottweiler Jesus."
