Come-on jokes

Guy goes to the doctor. The doctor says, "You look run down." The guy says, "No, I've come on my bike!"

God creating bees.

God: "Put a needle on their butt."

Angel: "Come on, God, wha-"

God: "Make its puke delicious."

Angel: "WTF"

A mushroom walked into a pub.

He asked the bartender to give him a beer.

The bartender said, "I can't, you'll get too rowdy."

The mushroom then said, "Oh come on! When I drink, I'm a fun guy!"

Come on guys, this is nasty, he was my uncle, ffs :(

So there was a school shooting in Florida. Why didn't the shooter just go to Disney?.......sorry, I just work there and I'm trying to get people to come on down.

What's the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.

I saw my sister masturbating with a carrot. I said, "Come on, I was gonna eat that later! Now it's just gonna taste like carrots!"