Clergy jokes
Why are priests so bad at racing? They are always in the 'little behind'.
There were four men eating dinner on the Titanic when it hit the iceberg.
The waiter said, "We have to get to the lifeboats!"
The teacher said, "What about the kids?"
The lawyer said, "Fuck the kids."
The priest said, "Do you think we'll have time?"
What's the difference between a priest and Woody from Toy Story?
Woody goes limp when a kid walks in the room.
What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? A roamin' Catholic.
A policeman walks up to a van with two priests and says, "We're looking for two child molesters."
The priests both look at each other for a moment and then say, "Okay, we'll do it."
Two priests walk into a store, and cops come up to them and say they’re looking for a child molester, and the priests both say, "I’ll do it!"
How do you know you've found a priest? When little Timmy is glued to his crotch.
I recently learned that churches won’t let trans men become priests because they don’t consider trans men as men, which is rather confusing to me.
As a Jew, I don’t know very much about Christianity, but from what I’ve heard, don’t priests love little boys?
Why was baptism invented?
How else was a priest supposed to clean his sex toys?
Person: "How many people have you had intercourse with?"
Me: "Nun."
How do you get a nun pregnant?
Fuck her hahaha 🤣
This guy comes knocking on the door in hell and speaks to God. "Please let me out, it is too cold in here!"
God is all confused. "There is a big fire in there!" The guy answers, "Yes, there is, but you cannot get near it. All the bishops, cardinals, and priests are sitting around it."
When the orphan got a job as a priest, what was his name?
Father Les.
"Spray and pray," also known as a priest with an altar boy.
What's a priest's favorite toy?
A mute little boy.
A priest says to me, "Come up, my child." Then I said, "Do I know you? Because you're not my father."
Why did Michael Jackson like having little boys round him? He was studying for the priesthood.
What is a similarity between priests and doctors?
They both have fetishes for their professions.
They don't call priests "daddy," they call me daddy.
What’s the difference between Jeffrey Dahmer and a priest?
They both like lil' boys.