Clean jokes
If you're cleaning a vacuum cleaner, does that make you the vacuum cleaner?
Why does an orphan go to a sewer?
So it can wash up.
Papyrus: Sans, I have a joke. What do you call someone lazy and incompetent?
Sans: What do you call them?
Papyrus: YOU! NOW GET UP AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, YOU LAZY BONES!
Women should have the right to choose whether they want to do cooking or cleaning first.
Women should be allowed to leave the kitchen... to clean the rest of the house.
How do you clean the ocean?
With tide!
If you get out of the shower clean, how does your towel get dirty?
Dark jokes are like clean water, not everyone gets it.
How do you clean ash off a stove with chemicals?
Your friend took a shower and used Pantene, but I got a watermelon to keep me clean.
I like my women like how I like my cocaine, smuggled and cut clean.
"I used to be addicted to soap, but I'm clean now."
How do men like their women? Striped.
How does a priest like their children? Clean.
Why are most orphans strippers? They want to call someone mommy or daddy.
What is the difference between a stripper and candy? None. But they like it when you take the wrapper off.
Kid: I don't want to go to the movies.
Mom: Shut your mouth and clean my room!
Two women, Jane and Emma, are in the afterlife waiting for judgement.
Emma turns to Jane and says, "I'm just curious, but how did you die?"
Jane replies with, "I burnt to death."
Emma, shocked, responds with, "That sounds horrible! What was it like?"
Jane answers with, "It first felt really hot and painful, but then I felt nothing. How did you die?"
Emma replies with, "Well, I believed my husband was cheating on me. I decided to leave work early one day to make sure he was loyal. I found him on the phone with his mother. I thought he was hiding something from me so I ran to the bedroom and found nothing. Then I sprinted to the kitchen and didn't find anything. I then jolted outside to the backyard and just found that he hadn't cleaned the pool. I was so tired from running that I fell over into the pool and drowned."
Jane retorts with, "Well if you checked the oven neither of us would be here right now."
I was gonna clean my room
before I got high.
How does a prostitute make more than a drug dealer?
Because she can clean her crack and sell it again.
What do you call a cleaning skeleton?
The Grim Sweeper.
What do you call an emo kid playing with fire?
Forgot to clean little piece of dust.
Keep the planet clean. It's not Uranus.