Clean Jokes

Why haven’t any women gone to the moon...?

A: It doesn’t need to be cleaned

i went to see my dentist and she warned me it was going to hurt. then she told me she was having an affair with my husband. good news though...the cleaning didnt hurt.

I think it’s dumb that people say a woman belongs in the kitchen How else is the rest of the house going to get cleaned

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

I believe in a woman's right to choose... ... whether she wants to cook first and then clean or clean first and then cook.

what happened when the Cheetah took to many baths? He became spotless!!!

Whats the difference between a pc and a 6 year old, i dont have to clean out my pc

I wanted to do something nice for my uncle, so i cleaned out the nice vase that was given at grandma's funeral. It had so much sand im glad to help

Why did Michael Jackson dangle a baby over a balcony? He wanted to clean out the blanket

What is the difference between a Mexican maid and a Jewish maid? One of them won’t clean the oven

I respect woman’s choices....either she wants to cook first, then clean or is she wants to clean first the cook

How do men like their women? Striped

How does priest like their children? Clean

Why are most orphans strippers? they want to call someone mommy or daddy

What is the difference between stripper and candy? none. but they like it when you take the wrapper off

A man who drinks a lot is told by his that if he ever gets drunk again she will leave him. Later the man goes to a pub and drinks a lot and throws up all down his jacket. 'Oh no.' He says to his friend' if I go home like this again, my wife will leave me.' 'Dont worry' his friend says. 'Put a £20 note in your jacket pocket. When your wife challenges you, produce the money and say another man threw up on you and gave you the £20 note for the dry cleaning.' 'Brilliant!' the man says and goes home. He walks through his front door and his wife sees him. She is furious. 'No no' the man says producing the money from his inside pocket. 'A man threw up on me and gave me £20 for the dry cleaning.' 'Whats the other £20 note for?' asks his wife. 'Ah, that's from the man who shat in my pants.....'

Why does a orphan go to a sewer So it can wash up

One time their was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track a girl said excuse me can you move please I’m trying than the man stopped her sentence and said how is your t shirt so clean than she said back easy hung it up

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Women should have the right to choose whether they want to do cooking or cleaning first.

2 women, Jane and Emma, are in the afterlife waiting for judgement. Emma turns to Jane and says "I'm just curious, but how did you die?"

Jane replies with "I burnt to death."

Emma, shocked, responds with "That sounds horrible! What was it like?"

Jane answers with "It first felt really hot and painful, but then I felt nothing. How did you die?"r> Emma replies with "Well, I believed my husband was cheating on me. I decided to leave work early one day to make sure he was loyal. I found him on the phone with his mother. I thought he was hiding something from me so I ran to the bedroom and found nothing. Then I sprinted to the kitchen and didn't find anything. I then jolted outside to the backyard and just found that he hadn't cleaned the pool. I was so tired from running that I fell over into the pool and drowned."

Jane retorts with "Well if you checked the oven neither of us would be here right now."