Bros

Bros jokes

Covid

My brother caught Covid last month.

First I knew about it was when he speed-dialled me at 3am and gasped, "I can't breathe, I can't breathe!"

I just told him straight: "Bro... you really need to work on your George Floyd jokes."

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  • Orphan

    Orphans are really out here taking selfies.

    Nah bro, that's a family photo.

    Group

    What do you call a group of brothers who fuck one another?

    Super Smash Bros.

    Gay

    My cousin said being gay was such a pain in the ass and I asked him why and I said, "Cuz you get buttfucked?" and he said, "No, I get made fun of." and I said, "Why? Cuz you get buttfucked?" and he said, "No, turd." Then I said, "Wow, at least I'm not the one with real pains in my ass, bro."

    Memes

    Pilot

    My friends were the pilots on 9/11, they told me, "Bro, chill, it's just a prank!"

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  • Drug

    Man: *steals drink*

    Boy: bro😭😭

    Man: Why are u crying over a drink?

    Boy: That had drugs.

    Man: ....

    Kobe Bryant

    Bro, Kobe Bryant is singing with the basketball team in his helicopter, celebrating right now, I bet.

    Oh wait, I forgot.

    Twin Towers

    Me: Bro, I don't think the Twin Towers will ever order pizza again.

    Friend: Why?

    Me: Because when they ordered pepperoni, all they got was plane.

    Suicide

    🗣: "Stop making suicide jokes!"

    "Don't worry bro, I'll end it soon."

    Nazi

    Bro, I love hanging out with bullies. It's either we play Yahtzee or we playing Nazi.

    Mom

    You're gay.

    Bro, I am straighter than the pole that your mom dances on for me every night.

    Duck

    Me: *posts random joke about a duck*

    That one guy in the comment section for no reason: "Shut the f*uck up you dumb b*tch you are a piece of sh*t you..."

    That other guy in the comment section: "That’s actually offensive to ducks."

    Bro it’s a joke...

    Punch

    When my bro says "YOUR MOM" when I'm talking when I'm at school, and my friend says "YOUR MOM," me punches him;-;

    Bird

    Bro, yesterday this bird made the weirdest chirp. It sounded something like this:

    "Error code 6, 4, 4, 2, sound: bird call, failed to play, government drone 0, 7, 7, 5 requires maintenance."

    Anyone know what bird that is?

    Mirror

    You: Bro, this school picture is soooo ugly!! (Points to yours).

    Me: Bruh, you just typed up mirror!

    Living

    Bro, living is so expensive, and I'm not even having fun doing it or getting my money's worth.