Bone jokes
Why are school shooting jokes so funny?
Answer: The bullets hit your funny bone!
What’s a skeleton's favorite instrument?
The trom-BONE.
What does a skeleton tile his roof with? Shingles!
What's the difference between a skeleton and a baby? I don't set the skeleton on fire.
Papyrus: HUMAN, WHY ARE YOU SAD?
Me: I'm just BONELY.
Sans: Good one kiddo.
Sans: Why didn't the skeleton go to the party?
Papyrus: Because he looked like me.
Sans: Sure.
Papyrus was playing with the human, but then Papyrus fell and he broke the cell bone of the human.
Me: Okay, Papyrus. I'm no Sherlock Bones, but I'd say that Storyspin Sans is the Imposter.
What did the bones on the moon tell the astronaut?
The cow never made it.
Papyrus: Sans, I have a joke. What do you call someone lazy and incompetent?
Sans: What do you call them?
Papyrus: YOU! NOW GET UP AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, YOU LAZY BONES!
Beneath this monumental stone Lise, 80 pounds of skin and bone.
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument?
A trombone.
What do you call a skeleton with no bones? A boneless boy.
Fell Sans: Welp, you're BONED!
Fell Papyrus: DAMN YOU SANS!!!
- What did the skeleton say to his friend?
- Actually... TIBIA honest, I don't know how to complete this joke...
Two hunters are in the woods and one falls to the ground.
Terrified, he dials 911 and says, “Help! I think my friend is dying. What do I do?” The nurse says, “I need you to make sure he’s dead.” The hunter replies, “Ok, I’ll be right back.” The nurse is startled after hearing a gunshot. The hunter comes back and says, “I checked. Now what do I do?” The nurse replies, “I need you to make sure his heart has completely stopped.” She is startled when she hears the sound of a taser. The hunter comes back and says, “What’s next?” The nurse replies, “I need you to make sure his brain has completely shut down.” The nurse is once again startled when she hears the sound of a bone being crushed by what seemed to be a hammer. The hunter comes back and asks, “Anything else?” The nurse says, “Nope. That’s it.”
So, you're human, huh? Well, I'm a skeleton, so not much gets under my skin.
I used to have a skeleton of jokes, now my supply is bone dry. Guess I wasn’t that femurous.
Q: What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? A: A tromBONE.
How did the skeleton know it was gonna rain?
If you said he felt it in his bones, you're wrong. He watched the weather forecast.