Bone jokes
How did the skeleton know it was about to rain?
"Because he felt it in his bones?"
No,
He read the weather app, you idiot.
My friend wasn't laughing at my jokes, so I said, "Is your funny bone broken?" But he got mad, and then I said, "Do you have a bone to pick with me?" He tried to insult me, but I said, "Call me what you want, I got thick skin," and this story was down to the bone.
Why do skeletons like having sex with short girls before eating?
They like to bone a petite.
What did one skeleton say to another?
...nothing... they are dead... what did you expect?
What is a dog that you can drive?
A big doggy car.
How are giants and strippers alike?
They both grind men's bones to make their bread.
Never break someone's heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.
You look like a burger.
Q. What's the most musical bone?
A. The trom-bone!
Hey girl, are you osteoporosis, because you're giving me a "bone" condition.
What is a dog's favorite snack?
RUFFles.
Why are skeletons not funny? Because they have no humor. 🤣
I'm sorry for your loss.
It is going tibia okay.
Sans: Why couldn't the skeleton go to prom?
Papyrus: Why? AND YOU KNOW I HATE PUNS!
Sans: Because they had NO BODY to go with.
Papyrus: THAT IS ENOUGH!!!
Sans: Sorry, didn't mean to GET UNDER YOUR SKIN.
Papyrus: YOU HAVE MADE ME MAD TO THE BONE SANS......wait
Sans: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
I did a ton of work, a skele-ton.
What did the skeleton say when his girlfriend said, "I'm gonna break your heart?"
He says, "Go ahead, you're not breaking my 206 healthy bones!"
I'd make a joke about the chin bones, but y'all couldn't mandle it.
My jokes are pretty "bone-arifick," if I say so myself. Hehhehe... Get it?
Why did the skeleton want a friend?
Because she was feeling bonely.
You’ll need a bib when you’re done eating my ribs.