Body Image jokes
What does Kim Kardashian and the ocean have in common?
They both have plastic in them.
Fatty told Skinny, "Do you have any food? My stomach is empty and I haven't eaten."
Skinny replied to Fatty, "Well, doesn't seem like you need food, you ate the whole universe instead!"
Fat jokes and mom jokes馃槀
1. So fat when she sat on the toilet, she said, "A B C D E F G, get your fat ass off me."
2. So fat, your dad and her were in bed and tried to kiss. He鈥檇 have to slap her belly and ride the third wave up.
3. Yo mama so fat that when she went to Japan in a green bikini, they all started yelling, "Godzilla, Godzilla."
4. Your mama鈥檚 so fat when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!
5. Bill was so fat when he stepped on the scale, it said "to be continued."
6. Yo mama so fat, she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.
My girlfriend broke up with me because I have a small dick. Too bad for her, because I give good sex.
How do you get a fat girl to bed? Piece of cake.
A fat man meets a skinny man.
The fat man tells the skinny man: "When people look at you, they think the world's starving to death."
And the skinny man responds: "When they look at you, they know why."
What do you call a flat-chested emo?
A chopping board.
Don't pick flat chests because they will turn their backs on you twice.
Friend texting fat boy: I know you're on the group chat. I can see you looking at my texts.
Me: I can only see fat.
So skinny you have to run around in the shower to get wet.
A fat girl was dancing on the table, and I said, "Nice legs." She says, "You really think so?" And I say, "Yes, definitely, most tables would have been broken by now."
Yo mama is so fat when she sees a bus full of white people, she thinks it's a Twinkie, lmao xd.
Ex-Boyfriend: You have no ass, so we're through!
Me: Stop being a dickhead, dude!! It ain't gonna make your little sausage any bigger!
Your mummy so skinny, she can't eat!
My wife wanted a boob job. I told her it was too expensive.
I told her all she has to do is take some toilet paper and rub it in between her boobs for a few days, and they would get bigger. She asked, "How is that supposed to work?"
I replied, "I don't know how it works, but it did a heck of a job on your ass!"
Yo Mama so fat, she has a Twinkie inside of a Twinkie inside of her fat ass motherfucking belly button!
Me: If a skinny person goes skinny dipping, then what do fat people do?
My friend: Chunky dunks.
You're so skinny my grandma gonna use you like a cane.
Yo momma so fat that people jumped on her cuz they thought she was a school bus.
When fat people smash, it must feel like a huge submarine hitting you.