Asshole jokes
How would you best describe prostate cancer?
Well, it is somewhere between a dick and an asshole!
What did the condom say when he came out of a gay guy's asshole?
He said, "Fuck this shit!"
Asshole.
I was with my blind friend, and he's telling me, "Yeah, I can read braille." So I hand him a Lego brick and ask him to read it. Apparently, Lego has been hiding a dark secret from us for years; as all their bricks read, "Screw you, asshole."
Someone butt-dialed me again yesterday. It seems that only assholes want to talk to me.
One day a boy asks his grandfather for some money, and the grandpa says, “Well, can your dick touch your asshole?” To which the boy replied, “No.” So the grandpa says, “Okay,” and leaves it at that and walks off.
A few years later, the boy asks his grandfather for some money again, and his grandfather once again asks, “Can your dick touch your asshole?” To which the boy proudly says, “Yes, it can.” To which the grandpa says, “Good, now go fuck yourself.”
Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.
A drunk walks into a bar and says, "All lawyers are assholes!" A guy at the other end of the bar says, "I resent that!" The drunk says, "Why, are you a lawyer?" and the other guy says, "No, I'm an asshole!"
Your mom's asshole.
Paedophiles are f***ing immature assholes.
Some guy farts and says, "That was some asshole behind me."
Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.