Are jokes
Why are Amoebas so bad at math?
Because, when they need to multiply, they divide.
When you donate a kidney, you are a total hero, everyone loves you.
When you donate five kidneys though, people start yelling, the police gets called--sheesh!
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims: they went through a hundred stories in 10 seconds.
Stairs are bad, because they are always up to something.
Why are orphans not allowed in stores?
Because else they would actually feel at home.
Memes
Yes, you are the one who can get it, and what time do I have?
Why is it hard having a relationship with an astronaut?
Because they are always so distant. :-]
There are three types of people in the world: those who can count, and those who can't.
I ran into a dwarf, and he said, “Well, I’m not happy.”
Me: Then which one are you?
Why is a deck of cards similar to a miniature pony?
They are both jokers.
Why do orphans go to church?
Not because they are religious, because they want someone to call father.
Jokes about ISIS are all about the execution.
What did the Twin Towers say to each other?
Sorry if that offended anyone.
“I guess we are going down together!”
Girls are like blackjack.
I always want 21 but end up hitting on 14.
As a straight son, one day I asked my mom, "Have you ever quit something that you did before?" My mom said, "No, I never quit anything." So I asked my when you give a blow job you ever spit, then my mom said, "What did I say? Quitters are for spitters."
Are you angry?
Go bully an orphan!
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Q: Why are school shooting jokes funny?
A: Because they're intended for a young audience.
Are you the Twin Towers? I can't stand you.
I'm Asian and there is a saying that dogs are man's best friends. They are my best friends because they keep me from starving.
What's the difference between Pink Floyd and George Floyd?
When Pink Floyd can't breathe, it's because all their fans are smoking pot.