ANS jokes
Our teacher told us to write a story about the life of an object that's not alive, so I wrote a story about an emo kid.
What do you call an emo with knife cuts on their wrist?
A barcode.
I went to a tall girl and I asked her, "What do you do for a living?" She says, "An account." So I reply with, "An accounting the hairs on people's heads," and then I run away.
I made a website for an orphan.
It had no homepage.
Your hairline is so far back that when I put on my glasses, I thought I saw an "M" for McDonald's on your hairline.
What do you call a dumpster with an antenna on it? Radio Morocco.
I saw a kid with no phone. I gave him an iPhone 14.
Except it had no home button.
I got a bowl of rice that you're formed like, an ice cube.
What do you call an orphan's family tree?
A stump.
If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
An emo kid and a silent kid would be a good acquaintance because the emo would wish to die, and the silent kid would be the nice guy and grant that wish.
What's an orphan's least favorite show? Family Guy ;)
It’s not like they can watch it anyway: it’s PG.
Punch an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Guys, what do you call an un-aborted and parentless child?...
An orphan.
Did you know that Stephen Hawking's death was an accident because he pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep mode?"
Which falls faster, a feather or an emo?
A feather, because the emos are always hanging in.
What's the difference between an orgy and mass suicide?
When exactly my cult members drink the Kool-Aid.
"Imagine being an orphan, could never be me," I say. For some reason, everyone started crying, then I walked out of Dave's orphanage.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
You call it a school shooting.
I call it an unfair shootout.