ANS jokes
Q: What season can an orphan see their family tree?
A: Fall.
If you don't get it, in the fall trees have no leaves, there [are] just empty branches, like an orphan's tree.
If Trump colored his hair green and wore an orange shirt and pants, I will call him a carrot.
When an emo kid jumps out of a tree, what happens when he hits the ground?
Nothin' much, he just flops over an hour later when they untie the rope.
What do you call an African American pilot?
A pilot, you racist bastard!
Why is an orphan really good at being naughty?
Because they have no one to tell them off.
Why is an orphan good at being naughty?
Because they don't have no one to tell them off.
What does an orphan call home?
Nothing. 🤣
What is an orphan's least favorite TV show?
"Full House."
An alligator is in a class, turns out he likes teaching!
What do you call an alligator that likes donuts? A donutator!
Three guys are in the woods, a really smart guy, an average guy, and a really dumb guy. They're bored, so the smart guy decides to go hunting. A little while later he comes back with a deer. The average guy asks, "How did you do that?" The really smart guy says, "I see deer tracks, I follow deer tracks, I see deer, I shoot deer." The average guy says, "I think I understand," and leaves. A little bit later he comes back with a raccoon. The really dumb guy goes *gasp*, "How did you do that!?" And the average looks at him funny and says, "Well, I see raccoon tracks, I follow raccoon tracks, I see raccoon, I shoot raccoon." The super dumb guy thinks for a second and says, "Oooohh, ok, I think I can do that..." and leaves.
Hours pass, and the guy finally returns, hurt, bloody, and horribly mangled. They run to help him. Finally, one of the guys asks him what happened. This is what he said: "I see train tracks, I follow train tracks, I see train, I shoot train. But train keep coming."
How do you blow up an Indian? Press the red dot in the middle of their forehead!
🤣😂😆😁
What do you call an acid with a bad attitude?
A-Mean-O-Acid.
Hey guys, it's an alien!
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Make him clap until his parents come back.
A blonde walks into the doctor's office. She tells the doctor, "My boyfriend has dandruff."
The doctor tells her to use Head and Shoulders. She leaves. About an hour later, the doctor's phone rings. He answers, it's the blonde. The doctor asks how he can help her. "Well doctor, I understand head, but how do you 'hove' shoulders?"
When you're angry, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
My teacher said, "Say welcome to our new student; he's an orphan." The teacher said, "Is anyone missing?" I said, "That kid's parents."
What do you call sex in the World Trade Center?
An inside job.
A man walks into an AA meeting and asks for a roadmap.