And jokes
Hey, y'all, I just wanna say thanks to Gwen on here. She writes jokes, and she got me through a lot xx.
When the school shooter throws a smoke grenade into the classroom, and the autistic kid thinks it's a disco party. 🕺🕺🕺
What is the difference between cum and milk? Nothing. They are both white and tasty.
Yo mama's so heavy and fat, gravity could not hold her down.
Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite, and if they do, hit them with a shoe till they're all black and blue!
Memes
Donald Trump is getting all the perks of 2020. He got COVID and lost his job.
Please help, my dad is an addict. He won't stop, and he eats my food.
Sometimes I think, should I kill him? But nah, he will go down with the others who did that too.
What’s the difference between an epileptic corn shucker and a prostitute with diarrhea?
The epileptic corn shucker “shucks between fits”...
Where do sex addicts go when they need to talk? Hoe-and-Tell.
What’s black and white and dead all over? My Chemical Romance.
Knock knock?
Who's there?
Not Sally, she doesn’t have any arms.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? She doesn’t have any arms.
Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus.
Why are a gun and a bag of chips alike?
You pull them out at school and everyone wants to be your friend.
What is long and hard and full of seamen?
A submarine.
Dog walks into a bar and says, "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw."
A pirate walks into a bar and has a ship's wheel in his pants.
The bartender asks, "What's with the wheel in your pants?"
The pirate replies, "Yarrr! It's drivin' me nuts!"
A kid and an apple fall from a tree, who will reach the ground first?
The apple, because the kid is hanging on the tree with a rope.
What's the difference between a priest and McDonald's? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
What is the difference between a gay person and a refrigerator?
The refrigerator doesn’t start moaning and groaning when you try to put the meat in.
Why is "dark" spelled with a K and not a C?
Because you can't see in the dark.
If a girl jumps off a cliff, some people call it suicide and some call it girl power, but I call it BULLSHIT.