Ambiguity jokes

Is a disabled person who has no arms but has guns armed or not armed?

I stole one's balls.

What’s the best part about banging twenty-eight year olds? There are twenty of them.

A girl asked, "Can I have some nuts too?"

Boy: "Sure, what ones ;)"

Teacher: "What's your name?"

Student: "Hang on a second."

10 seconds later:

Teacher: "Is something wrong?"

Student: "Hang on a second!"

20 seconds later:

Teacher: "Don't say a word!!!"

Student: "Hang on a second!!!"

Teacher: "Come here and tell me your name right now!!!"

Student: "Hang on a second!"

Teacher: "Don't call for help!!!"

Student: "Just listen to me!"

Teacher: "Go on, speak!"

Student: "Hang on a second!"

Teacher: "Don't push my patience; this is no joke!!! Tell me your name right now!"

Student: "Hang on a second!!!"

“Wanna smoke, kids?” is an offer to do drugs.

“Wanna smoke kids?” is an offer to kill.

Why did Anna give Carson a blowjob?

He made her.

English is weird. It can be understood through tough, thorough thought, though.

Any game: "Are you a boy or a girl?"

Non-binary people: *cries*

I can't find out where Stephen Hawking is from, I just can't place his accent.

If a heterosexual man gets anonymous oral sex from another heterosexual man at a glory hole, it's called a "brojob", but if a homophobic heterosexual man gets anonymous oral sex from a gay man at a glory hole, it's still called a "brojob". Does it cycle now?

Slavery and discipline, it's kind of the same thing. You get whipped for doing the wrong thing.