Amativeness Jokes

I have something on my lip and i think I’m taller than you “Who am i”

A mathematics professor arrived home at 3 am drunk...

His wife was up waiting for him...

"You said you'd be home by 11:45!" she yelled

He responded, "No my dear, I said I'd be home at a quarter of 12."

Weed: *gets hit my his own power*

Cop: Wait, shouldn’t you be resistant to your own element?

Weed: Are you resistant to bullets when you shoot a gun?

(From Unknown Superheroes 11 by I am Mobo

A man goes into the streets of Moscow and yells, “I am tired of this guy with a silly mustache and stupid rules being a leader!” A soldier heard him, so he goes and catches him, later he brings the man to Stalin. The soldier says to Stalin what happened and Stalin asks the man, “Who were you thinking about when you yelled in the streets?” The man responds, “Of course, I was thinking about Hitler!” Stalin lets him go but then he stops the soldier and says, “Who were YOU thinking about?”

I am Paul walker

what did the tower say to the other one

i will see you later i am about to get hit

I am a George Formby fan,and I love football...my favourite manager was Arsen Wenger...my favourite referee was Collina...my favourite player was Dean Windas........so my favourite George Formby song was Wenger,Collina,Windas

I’m tall when I’m young, and I’m short when I’m old. What am I?

Roses are red I am dead u could call me wet or I will keep ur dread

It was raining sadly all day my wife my 2 daughters and me stuck in the house when wife’s mom and dad just died

Wife:😭😭😭I wish this never happened

Mia our first daughter: momy it’s ok I love whenever I see you🥰🥰

Abby our second daughter: I love u all only if you guys die I won’t but I love you when ur alive 😉😏

Me husband: what kind of nonsense was that you love us when we’re alive but you don’t love us when we’re dead🤥😥😓

Everyone except abby: abby this is serious mommy’s mother and father died. says Mia: yes your mom is sadly down right now you made her more sad😡🤬.says dad:sniffs* abby I had made a discussion I will take to an orphanage I am sorry 😣 when I amd better and happy and I forgot what you said then we’ll get you back.says mom:

This was not a joke I just did this for Love 💕

Teacher:i am a orphan Students:oof Teacher:is there anyone missing Students:your parents

Hi are you even my sister.yes I am. No you not because you never even existed as my sister

I AM STARTING A FROG CULT NOWWWW

I unironically shit myself, I am so sorry

You have five seconds to kill me 1.. 2... 3... 4- thank you i can rest now- WAIT HOW AM I TALKING??????????????????????

Man I am jealous of the victims of 9/11. They are the fastest readers, who went through 87 stories in 8 seconds.

My brother eats water from the pig factory at 1:am, and blames a deaf kid, so he ended up going to solitary

*walks into a comedy night club* Owner: You're doing standup tonight right?* Noob Joker (you): *Yes I am!* Owner: Get onto the stage Me: *walks up stage* Owner: this is the standup comedian noobpro Me: HEY GUYS HOW ABOUT SOME DONALD TRUMP Crowd: *RUNS*