Also jokes

You know, you should adopt a pet. So then you can feel the pain that your parents felt when they adopted you... wait... also the regret after.

Nah, I'm Hawaiian but I'm also Japanese. So does that mean I bombed my own harbor?

What’s something you can say at the funeral but also in bed?

"Damn, that's really stiff!"

Lil bro's hairline is making me hungry wit that M shape also hitten me wit that damb batab bat bat baaa.

Woman: I want a man who is 6 feet and 6 inches.

Man: Is 6 feet and 6 inches one thing or two?

Woman: Two, I want a man who is 6 feet and also is 6 inches.

Man: Shit!

Fruit is like life. You slowly eat it away as it slowly also begins to rot like everyone I’ve known.

If you text your crush and they leave you on read, just know that "read" has four letters. You know what also has four letters? "Mine." So that basically means that you are theirs. :)

"Left, center, right, and apolitical, also skeptical, are also a joke."

Wife: “I want another baby.”

Husband: “That’s a relief, I also really don’t like this one!”

Troll your friend by saying "I" and saying "cup," and then tell them that that means "I see you pee."

LOL

There is also "lettuce cup," which means "let us see you pee."

I put this joke so the amount of jokes will be 69. Also, I have 50 kids in my basement. I fed "Twinkies" last night.

The Twin Towers ordered 3 tacos.

One was just a plane tortilla.

The other one was also just a plane tortilla.

And the third one went to the wrong address.

Are you Spanish, because I will say "Hola."

Do you go to a biblioteca? Also, in Spanish, you will never guess the word "biblioteca." Find it, I dare you.

I'd love to move to a country ruled by Scott Stapp of Creed. Not only is it a place with golden streets, but it also welcomes people of all kinds with arms wide open.

Anakin Skywalker: I don't like sand.

*also him*

Anakin Skywalker: I lived on sand.

I'm always forgetting these kinds of jokes. I also forgot my son's name.

Hi Alex, you will probably not see this till the morning, but I just wanted to say I have had fun since you were here. Also, thank you so much for protecting me and being there for me. And yeah, have a good day!

Why does new pavement smell like butt?

In other words you can also call it asphalt.

Ass-phalt.

"Don't sneeze!"

Every time I was in the bathroom with my friends, I would always tell them, "Don't sneeze!" and when I did, they just laughed so hard. And when we sneezed, we laughed even harder.

Also,

"It dangles and swung!"

Language art quizzes are the best.

I’m enyaw and I fancy my PE teacher. She is called Kelly Pearce and I go to Beckfoot Oakbank. I always watch her because I am a creep. I live at school under the stairs, but I also try [to] follow her home, and if I'm unsuccessful I look her up on a dodgy website and go on Google maps and look at her door.