Also Jokes

why did the monkey fall out of the tree he was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree he was also dead why did the third monkey fall out of the tree monkey see monkey do why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree he was stapled to the first one


Therapist: What do you want to do when you grow up? Me: Oh I wan- Therapist: Don’t say to be dead Me: Well I want to be an entrepreneur, I want to sell land, pencils oh yeah. I also want to sell farm

Me. i asked an orphan were his parents were i also said that i promised to take him to them Orphan. there dead Me. a promise made is a promise kept

A man walks into a bar, he takes a seat and asks the barmen if he wanted to hear a blonde joke, the barmen replies before you tell this joke I want to tell you something, see the women over there, she is a black belt in karate, she's blonde , see the bouncer over there he is also a blonde, see the chick over there with that pool que she is also blonde, also I have a shotgun behind the bar i'm blonde, so do you still want to tell your joke? He replies f**k that I ain't explaining the joke 4 times.

My initials are K.M.C

Which could also stand for Kill Main Character.

Which I am planning to do in this book I’m writing.

I’m writing an autobiography.

Suicidal ideation is like wanting to slaughter someone but knowing/feeling that you can't. It's also In a way kind of like seeing a really hot chick that you wished you could F but you again for whatever reason you either feel you can't or you just can't...............

Not totally a joke but... What do all these rape joke naysayers have in common with rapists?

They are also forcing themselves on others.

I remember waving at this guy in the street, the asshole didn't wave back... Come to think of it he was also swing around a weird stick.

Why aren’t apple chargers called apple juice. Also How do u throw away trash cans?

You know the drill, but do you know the hammer? Hah, nailed that one. But I also think I screwed it up.

Once there was this Whichdoctor, he walked barefoot most of the time which gave him impressive calluses on his feet. He also ate very little and the food gave him bad breath. Which made him (wait for it), A Super Callused Fragile Mystic Hexed By Halitosis.

Orphan: "I want to be a superhero."

Me: "You should be Batman."

Also me: *starts laughing* because Batman doesn't have parents...