Alabama jokes
Calling Alabama's football team an astonishment would be the biggest understatement of the century, especially since they continuously catch balls from someone who isn't related to them.
How do you circumcise someone from Alabama?
Kick his sister's jaw.
Why do people in Alabama like eating sandwiches? They like things in bread.
If you're in Alabama, family reunions are basically speed dating events.
I hate prom in Alabama. They always say, "Uhh, actually this is our family reunion." We are in Alabama, so they are the same thing.
Why is reverse cowgirl illegal in Alabama? Because you should never turn your back on family.
Two girls have a sleepover.
Karen: Let's go to bed.
Lauren: Fine, but it's early.
*Karen wakes up and exits room*
*Lauren hears noise*
Mikey: You're so much better than my girlfriend, Karen.
Lauren: *laughs*
Lauren: *remembers her boyfriend is Karen's brother, Mikey*
There are two types of people in Alabama: the orphans and the incests.
Alabama's saying: It's not cheating if we’re all siblings.
What do you call a group of black men hanging from a tree?
Alabama wind chimes.
Q. What's the best part of living in Alabama?
A. Not having to change your last name when you get married.
When Cincinnati played Alabama in 2021, they wore black at their funeral! 🤣
Blossom: Why are we dating the Rowdyruffs when we're technically siblings?
Bubbles:...
Buttercup: I don't know, but those people over there are lookin' at us weird.
Alabama: 😈
When I say, "Daddy," my stepbrother raises his head.
Sam Gonzales
What's a brother and sister from Alabama's favorite sex position?
The cowgirl.
One day I met a blind guy and I said, "You should see Mt. Cheaha!"
Why can't orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.
I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home page.
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away. Orphan: But why? Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Cause they come back.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Girls are like rocks; the flat ones get skipped.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
If you hit an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
If you hit an orphan with a car, at least you don't have to tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
What does an orphan call a family photo? A selfie.
Why was the orphan a big success? Cause people say go big or go home, he only had one option.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common? They can’t see their parents.
Why can't orphans hear about ancient Egypt? Because they don’t know what a mummy is.
Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
GF: What did you use as kissing when you were little?
Me: My sister.
SWEET HOME ALABAMAA
What do you call a group of Alabama superheroes?
The Incredibles.