Orphan
Dad/Mom: Son, you're adopted.
Son: I know. *holds up daddy's phone that has the text of them talking about it.*
Dad: Babe, we need to talk.
Mom: Okay......
Dad: He's grounded.
Mom: You're right, you're grounded! Oh, and I'm dumping you.
Son: Am I getting a new daddy?
Mom: Soon honey, soon....
Dad: I really shouldn't have let her know I cheating.
Your mom wants to tell you that you're adopted, but you were an orphan.
Why have kids? Just go get one now, no nine-month delay.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Their dad didn't come back with the milk.
How are Tinder and orphans alike?
You swipe left till you find the one you like.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
Why do orphans play GTA?
Because they need to know what it’s like to be wanted.
Orphan kids only play GTA5 so they can be wanted.
What's the difference between puppies and orphans?
The puppies actually get adopted.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple? An apple gets picked.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Well, at least one gets picked.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One of them gets picked up.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple? The apple got picked.
Once I saw a girl crying and asked, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at orphanages.
Why do orphans not play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
Dad, am I adopted?
NO! Why would I ever choose you?
I asked my mom if I was adopted. She said no, "Why the fuck would I adopt you?" and I said "I'm gonna kill myself," and she also said, "Make sure you do it right this time."
Isn't it sad that orphans are only allowed self raising flours Orphan-👁👄👁
Me: Shut up! If you don't shut up, I'm gonna tell your parents!
You: Why? I don't have any.
