Actuality jokes
Wanna know why the plane actually crashed?
Someone turned off flight mode.
(Or a kid just turned on airplane mode.)
Lemme just say one thing:
Depression is not funny. Two of my best friends have it, and it's actually quite hard to watch them suffer with it. They cry all the time, they get upset all the time, they either have wanted to or still do want to kill themselves. It's really not funny to joke about depression.
Why is an orphan bad at hide-and-seek?
Because nobody will actually look for them.
Luigi and Daisy are actually Aussie! How?
They wear GREEN and GOLD! The Aussie Colors!
What's the difference between orphans and apple trees?
The apples actually get picked.
Why do orphans like being criminals?
Because then someone actually wants them.
I wrote a song about tortillas...
Actually, it's more of a wrap.
I wrote a song about a tortilla yesterday, but it’s actually more of a rap.
Why is Homelander an orphan's favorite superhero?
Because they can actually land a home.
What's Technoblade's actual Zodiac Sign?
Cancer!
How did Technoblade actually die?
He got stabbed!
Q: Why do orphans love boomerangs?
A: Because they actually come back.
What is the difference between an adopted kid and an orphan?
If you're adopted, you're actually wanted.
I am an actual police officer (Not gonna mention with which department in case they actually check this site) and tbh I find these jokes funny as fuck, carry on boys.
What's the difference between me and an orphan's parents?
I actually come back with the milk.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One's actually picked.
Why do orphans want a sugar daddy?
They actually can call someone "daddy!"
What is an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it actually comes back.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples actually get picked.
What do you call a fat Indian that is actually a machine?
The "curry muncher 2000."