what do white people and fences have in common? they both get jumped by mexicans
walk in to a gun store everything was half off I didn't know back to school shopping started
I like my people how I like my tea..
In a bag under water.
Whats the worst thing to say at a funeral? "Hi guys, welcome to my unboxing video!"
Why is the tower of Pisa leaning Because unlike the twin towers it can doge
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? Hold on to your nuts, this ain’t no ordinary blowjob.
Me: Mom, should I kill the main character in the book I'm writing to make things more interesting?
Mom: Sure, honey! What type of book are you writing?
Me: It's an autobiography.
Teenager: OMG, I’m prego, my moms gonna kill me Baby: Lmao, same
Remember if you are suffering from paronia ...
You are not alone
Hey Siri, where is my dad? Your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas. HAH, jokes on you! My dad’s in the kitchen! Your mom’s husband is in the kitchen, your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas. …WhAT-
1 like = 1 more child in my blender
A lot of people claim that white privilege does not exist. Well, how the hell do you explain Michael Jackson not being charged for raping children, despite ample evidence?
so i was on the phone with a scam caller, he said he knew where i lived and would kill my children and wife jokes on him i already did.
Someone glued my deck of cards together. I don't know how to deal with it.
I just watched a documentary about Adolf Hitler.
He sure was a popular guy. Everywhere he went, people shouted “Hi Hitler” and gave him a little wave.
Damn bro, are you Gold, Titanium, Sulfur, Titanium, and Carbon?
Cuz you be lookin AuTiSTiC
Two wrongs don't make a right, take your parents as an example.