The term every 60 seconds is so stupid You know Africans don’t get seconds
What do you call a blowjob in Africa? Breakfast
How is blessed with a 9 inch dick That priest is in jail now. Shout out to the church
Why the hell would I go to a shooting range when could I go to school and do it for free?
What would a dwarf say when they broke? You money? cause I'm short
There was this girl on the street that had no arms and no legs. She looked at me and said “Hey sir, I’ve never been fucked before, will you fuck me?” So I threw her in the ocean and said “Well, you’re fucked now.”
I was driving and accidentally hit a crippled kid, they were still breathing so I told them to walk it off.
My wife told me to contact more of my feminine side I crashed the car and fucked my trainer
What do orgasms and pulses have in common? I don’t care if they have either of them
I used to believe everything in the Bible until I tell I read about the Jew giving out the free fish
A normal exorcism is getting a demon out of a person but a reverse exorcism is the devil telling the priest to get out of the child
John pretended to be a doctor. Motu came to him. He said "I lost my hunger". John brought some samosas for his lunch. Motu ate them. John said "Your hunger is back!" Then,Motu said "I lost my taste." John said "Number 1,bring some water." Motu drank it and said "This is petrol!" John said "Your taste is back!" Motu said "I lost my memory." John said "Number 1, bring some medicine." Motu said "But Number 1 brought water." John said "Your memory is back!"
A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" the man asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said. "I spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on green fees at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"
"Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?" the man asked.
"What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?" exclaimed the homeless man.
"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty and I probably smell pretty disgusting."
The man replied, "That's okay. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, golf and sex."
Little Johnny walked into class with a black eye and the teacher said, "Why do you have a black eye?" Johnny said, "Well, me and my parents have to share a bed, and my dad asked me if I was asleep and I said no, so he smacked me." The teacher said, "Well tonight, don't say anything." The next day, Johnny walked in with another black eye and the teacher said, "Why do you have another black eye?" Little Johnny said, "Well, last night, I did what you said and didn't say anything when my dad asked me if I was asleep. A few minutes later, my dad said he was coming, and my mom said she was coming too. They usually don't go anywhere without me so I said 'Wait for me, I'm coming too."
Yo mama so fat, she doesn't need internet, she's already WORLDWIDE
DON'T COMMIT SUICIDE, THAT WOULD MAKE DJUNGELSKOG SAD!!!
do you know why I'm scared of Bungy jumping? because i was brought into this world by broken rubber i want wanna be taken out of this world by broken rubber
Why download fruit ninja when you have your arm
What do you call a black goldfish? A gigger
Why did the short person bring a ladder to the bar?
Because they heard the drinks were on the house!
