My dad may be working, but the coping mechanisms sure aren't
Why does the army take orphans as fighter jet?
Because homing middles don’t work on them.
What’s an emo kids favorite wood working tool? A chop saw!
I wanted to hire a butler for my new mansion in downtown LA. As he arrived, he introduced himself and I discovered it was Ghostionel Pessi. I asked him why is he working as a butler? He told me that “ a big game is coming up so he needs to refine his bottleling skills. DAMN PESSI
There are three people on the steps of Heaven. God tells them all he is having a good day and if they make him laugh by telling him how they died he will let them in. The first one said I just finished a long day of work and I get home and right as I stepped in I knew my wife was cheating on me. I searched everywhere and I couldn’t find anybody so I got a drink and went to the balcony and then I saw him, hanging off the ledge of the balcony. I kicked his hands but he wouldn’t fall so I threw a Refrigerator at him and I fell with the Refrigerator. God busted out laughing and let him in. The next person walked up and God told him the same thing he told the other person. God told him that he didn’t think that he could make him laugh more than the first person. The second guy said, so get this I’m a window washer on the 8th floor I’m washing the windows like normal and this enraged psychopath walks up and starts kicking my hands and then he throws a refrigerator at me and I die. God bursts out laughing so much to where he falls off his chair and he lets the guy through. The next guy comes up and God tells him the same thing he told the last two people and he tells him that there is no way that he can make him laugh more than the other two did. So he starts talking. So get this I’m in a refrigerator...
i dont want to die alone.... that is why i am working my way up to become a suicide bomber!
why cant orphans work a McDonalds ? cause they call their employees family
this guy looked down the aisle and asked hey are those kids all yours an i replied: no i work for a condom company and these kids are just all of my complaints
I was working in a IPhone store in Norwich, when an man came! He said "Give me hat-trick or i will destroy your store!" I said "No" and he started to smash phones! I imidiatelly screamed "Important game" and he disappeared! Shame on you penaldo for ruining my store! 😡😡
There was a house with three storey building 🏢 First one had Mexicans Second one had Africans Third one had white people Earthquake came But who did survive? 🤔 The white family Cause they were at work
I was at school one day and my teacher gave me home work and once i got home i did not do my home work but i watched TV after movie i finally went to go do my home work i was almost done with my home work when i got to the last question i didnt know the answer so i asked the closest living being to me witch was my dog and i asked him: whats two minus two? he said nothing
I FOUND A KEY THAT WORKS FOR EVERY DOOR AT MY SCHOOL
I work as an IT technician. The other day I had to fix Cristiano Ronaldo’s laptop. He pointed to a message on the screen saying “do you consent to cookies.” He said that he doesn’t eat cookies and doesn’t know what consent means so that’s why he called me
The best part of working at an orphanage is you can give them family-size chips.
God my dad got so pissed during 9/11.
All that work wasted.
In America, you work on plantation In Soviet Russia, plantation work on you!
If someone told me to bring up 9/11. They were trying to make a funny joke but it didnt work. That one really *crashed and burned*
Why cheetah don’t say goodbye because they are not going to work
why can't emos work at a restaurant. Because they cut to much
I got fired for not doing enough work Guess I didn’t put enough back-bone into it
