I met a fat chick at the beach.
People started asking me what I use for bait, or do you want us to help throw the whale back in the water?
Bully: Ur momma so fat that the whales said we are family even though you are a little bigger than us.
Nerd: Yo momma so ugly that when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out.
Silence...................punch!
How do you fit a whale inside a car? A blender.
A dolphin swims into a bar, and looks at the menu. He calls the bartender and orders a pint of ginger-whale.
I took my girlfriend to the beach, and a marine biologist thought she was a beluga whale.
Last week I went on a whale watch.
After everyone had piled onto a boat, they loaded the boat onto a trailer and drove to your house.
What does a shark smoke? Sea-weed.
How do whales breathe underwater? They take a deep meth.
Beach whales.
Me: Hey do you live in the ocean? random guy: Why? Me: Because you look like a whale.
Why did the whale cross the ocean?To get to the other tide!!!😂
What’s the difference between a whale and Lizzo?
Absolutely nothing.
Ur mama so fat that when she when to the ocean all the whales started singing we are family even know your fatter than me
For centuries, Japan’s feudal dictators, called Shoguns, enforced strict laws that kept people from leaving or entering the country. This practice isolated Japan from the rest of the world. By the middle of the 19th century, Japan’s isolationism was creating problems for the United States’ whaling industry whose ships needed coal, food, and water available in Japanese ports. And sailors who were shipwrecked on the coast of Japan needed protection from mistreatment.
In November 1852, President Millard Fillmore sent an expedition to Japan to solve these problems. Led by Commodore Matthew C. Perry, the expedition had both steam-powered and sail-powered warships and several hundred men. Perry’s task was to persuade the Japanese to sign a treaty with the United States that would open Japanese ports and protect shipwrecked sailors. On July 8, 1853, the Perry expedition sailed into Edo Bay about thirty miles from the city of Edo (modern Tokyo).
During talks with the Shogun’s representatives, the idea of a treaty was repeatedly rejected. But Perry didn’t give up. Finally, in February 1854, the Japanese agreed to negotiate a treaty. The Treaty of Kanagawa established peace between the two countries, opened two ports to U.S. shipping, and protected shipwrecked sailors. It was signed on March 31, 1854.
Perry’s expedition also opened Japan to the rest of the world. Within two years, Japan signed similar treaties with Russia, Holland, and Britain.
What did one male whale say to the other male whale?
"She's gonna blow!"
Suzy: How did johna fit in the whale? Teacher: Whales are very big but have small moths, so johna did not actually fit in the whale. Suzy: well the bible says he did Teacher: He did not Suzy: when I get to heaven I will ask him how he fit in Teacher: How do you know he went to heaven, maybe he went to hell Suzy: Than you can ask him.
Why don't sharks eat n****rs? They think it's whale shit.
A whale went to the country Wales for vacation.
When it ended, what did he say? "I had a whale of a time!"
2 whales went to a bar. The first whale said, "oooooooohhhhhh. The second whale said, "Greg I think your drunk, let's go home."
Yo mama so far I thought see was a beach whale
What did the whale say? Nothing! It just wailed
