Virtual Assistant jokes

This is so sad, Alexa, play Despacito.

I once told Siri, "Hey Siri, why am I still single?" She opened the front camera.

"Alexa, open Kahoot!"

No matter how lonely you get, you have Explain Bear.

Explain Bear is always there for you.

Today, I asked my phone, "Siri, why am I still single?" and it activated the front camera.

Hey Siri, where is my dad?

Your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas.

HAH, jokes on you! My dad’s in the kitchen!

Your mom’s husband is in the kitchen, your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas.

...WhAT-

Men vacuum in the same way that they have sex.

They just put it in and make some noise for 3 minutes before they collapse on the couch and think that their wife should be really happy.

I have just started a sexual relationship with a blind woman. It's very rewarding, but quite challenging.

Took me ages to get her husband's voice right.

Dear disabled people, just go to the settings and enable it!