Truth

Truth Jokes

so I'm readin hamlet right and then this one page they like yo like hamleet the fuck t tgo foff off KING speak yo 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 truth ong fr 😂 Face withething is funny or ...😂 😂 😂 😂 the

Sultan Khan was an courtier in akbar s' court he wanted to make his son the royal treasure but his cunning plans always failed Sultan khan thought that birbal was to play his son's misfortune so he looked for a opportunity to get rid of birbal one day birbal was late to the emperor 's court seeing this angry when sultan khan said your majesty don't you think that birbal is taking his position he has been late these days this must be another plan to trap birbal said akbar So he decided to wait and see what and see what birbal would do So akbar sit next to suman khan and said yes he must be punished Suman khan was amazed to see his plan work this time From now you should not agree to anything he says today Akbar replied agreed Soon birbal came to court Please spare me from being here late my wife was unwell Akbar immediately said no Birbal was surprised He tried again by saying but that's the truth Please belive me Again akbar replied no There must be something going on thought birbal himself Then he asked can we discover important matters today Akbar immediately replied no we will not Then may I go home asked birbal Akbar said no you will stay here this evening said akbar enjoying himself Birbal understood what was happening Oh so this is my game the emperor is saying no to all my questions He saw around and saw suman khan smiling to see him in trouble This must be his idea Let me teach him a lesson The clever birbal thought to akbar Very well he said But I have a last request will you please listen to me Akbar saw what birbal had done He was very pleased and called loudly No I will not listen to you That is all birbal said before returning to his seat Suman khan was thunned and angry And birbal had outwitted him an he could not make his son the treasure

Life asked death "why do people choose you over me?" death replied "because your the beautiful lie and i'm the painful truth."

Ahh son of a bitch I got the truth stuck on my shoe?!?! The truth: breast feeding is like have ong sex with your baby. God damit I hate the truth!

The very young and pretty nun was walking home from the soup kitchen when a homeless man dragged her into the woods and had his way with her. When he was done, he asked her what she would tell the Mother Superior when she got back to the convent. She calmly said that she would tell her the truth. She said: "I will tell her that I was on my way home when the most disgusting, repulsive and abhorrent man dragged me into the woods and had his way with me..... twice; that is if you are not too tired.

Karien: Don't care. You know what you did.

Jalie: I don't know what you mean. I did nothing! I'm telling the truth!

Karien: Sure. So you mean you never texed Oerien last night around 2:00 am?

Jalie: NO I NEVER DID THAT!

Karien: Jalie stop the story telling. You were the one who had my phone yesterday. Just stop.

Neona (😃): Gwen! I got the job!!!!!!!!!

Gwen (😁): I knew it !! I knew my prayer worked!

Neona (😁): He said that all my ideas are the best and that I start on Monday!

Gwen (😏): Man, don't you love Mr. Jaekson? He is the best person the company has ever had!

Neona (🙁): Who is Mr. Jaekson?

Gwen (😕): Wait ... Mr. Jaekson didn't interview you?

Neona (😕): No! Mr. Smith did. He said he was standing.

Gwen (😯): No, Mr. Smith, you are a fool who never lets you spread the word or do anything. I can also mention that he is a person who has sexual problems!

Neona(🤨,🙁,😠): Gwen, you are a liar!

Gwen (😟): No, I'm not. I'm telling the truth Neona!

Neona (😔): Gwen please be happy that I got the job without you lying that Mr.Smith sexual hassults women!!!

Gwen (🙁): He does your not listing.

Neona (🤬): I don't care BITCH!!!!

Kariana: Dad and mom, what is this bull? nonsense?!?!

Treon: How did you find that?!

Kariana: It was under the cabnet where you told me to put the streamers. I found these under the cabnet, did she have another sister you didn't tell me about? Now tell the truth, or else!

Petina: Now what have we told you about going it to things that are not yours!

Kariana: I just told you to say the fricking truth now who is Faineni? Were is she? Who is she? What is her date of birth? Why do I have her bra under here and why....IS IT UNDER THE FRICKING CABNET!!!!! ANSWER ME!!!!!!!!!

Treon: We can't!

Kariana: BULL SHIT!!!!!!!!

I just found out that there is a racist stereotype about Asians being bad drivers, which isn't true... but if it is then maybe Pearl Harbor was just an accident.

Little Johnny walked to his parents room, they were having sex and Little Johnny didn’t know what that was soo, he said “What are y’all doing?” The parents replied “Umm, r-rapping presents!” . Little Johnny said “ok.” and then left. In the morning Little Johnny opened his presents, his parents said “This one is from Santa!” Little Johnny said “No it’s not, y’all said y’all were rapping the presents.” The parents said “Ohh fuck” Little Johnny replied “What mommy and daddy?” They replied “Oh nothing!” “Oh ok.” Little Johnny said. The mom whispered in the dads ears “At least he doesn’t know the truth.” Little Johnny said “What truth.”

2

What do you call a born again heteroflexable male that is a christain nationalist who thinks he is bisexual when the LGBT community knows that he is bicurious and that he is on steroids and that the LGBT community knows that he is not telling the truth about that he is a gay man that is in the closet he should be forced out of the closet by gay men in the LGBT community by any means by necessary if gay men in the LGBT community still want to defend the wall of separation of church and state by any means necessary

a man dies and goes to heaven he sees a bunch of clocks and asks Jesus what they are for, he replied they are gauges, and that they move when people lie. he said that mother Teresa's has moved twice, Abraham Lincon's once, and George Washington's never. the man asks to see the current president's, and Jesus just laughs and says that Joe Bidden's is the one keeping the hurricane's to speed

3

A mom gave her son "the talk". her son replies "wait so there really isn't candy involved? Guess Grandpa lied.