Why are 10-pin bowlers always in pain?
Because their balls have holes in them.
Them Jokes
"Hey, man, do you have any Ben and Jerry's?"
"Yeah, I have two of them, fresh and preserved in the freezer."
"I meant the ice cream, bro..."
There was an orphan once, and someone knocks on his door and said, "Hello, son, come and hug me." But the orphan says, "Excuse me, who are you?" and the guy says, "You don't remember me? I'm your dad." And then the orphan says, "Fine then, if you're really my dad, come inside and let me ask you some questions." And the man says, "OK then, but I am really your dad." Then the orphan asked some questions to the man, and the man gets some of them right, so the orphan believes that the man is his dad. And then the orphan says, "You really are my dad?" and then he shows his dad his house, and the orphan has a roommate, and the dad and the orphan finally get to the bedroom, and then the dad knocks out the orphan, and then the dad starts to have something with the orphan/son, and the roommate hears weird noises in the orphan's/son's room, and he walks in and sees them having sex, and the roommate records it but then kicks the dad out of the house, and then the roommate shares the video to the orphan's school chat, and then the next day the dad gets arrested because he was actually a gay nonce, and everybody at the orphan's school calls him gay, but he really isn't, but since he was mad and disgusted, he pulled an AK47 out of his bag and kills everybody in the school and was never seen again.
Btw this is a joke so don't take it seriously.
I hope next time you ask your teacher to go to the toilet, your teacher says no, but when someone else asks, the teacher says yes to them.
If you're ever frustrated, just punch them in the face. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Some people are such treasures that you sometimes just wanna bury them.
Why can't orphans ride a bike?
'Cause their parents won't follow them.
Why do most orphans cook for themselves?
They don't have a home cook.
"Wubba Lubba Dub Dub" is one way to describe how my inner child acts, but yesterday I killed them. Now I hear "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," I’m drowning in the tub.
Teacher: Okay class, look at the person to the right of you and describe them with one word.
Me: *looks to the right of me and sees the pick-me girl* "Penny."
Teacher: *shocked* How is she a penny?
Me: 'Cause she's two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants. Not to mention worth practically nothing.
Why are orphans good at dodge ball?
No one misses them.
Whenever someone calls me ugly, I get super sad and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.
Handicapped jokes are so cruel.
I can't stand them!
I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.
What does the school shooter do after he shoots a victim? He shoots more kids in them!
Yo mama's so nasty, they used to call them jumpolines 'til yo mama bounced on one.
Yo mama's so stupid, when thieves broke into her house and stole the TV, she chased after them shouting, "Wait, you forgot the remote!"
Why are adopted kids better than bio kids? Because their parents actually wanted them.
What do you not say to an Emo if you want them to come round? "Wanna hang out."
How many heterosexual men does it take to change a lightbulb in heaven?
Both of them.
