Their jokes

Why did orphans have to drink their own piss?

Because last time they went to the bar, they went with their dad and drank some Corona, then got drunk and started eating someone's toenails, so his dad went to go get the milk and everybody had to evacuate the bar. Then the orphan started walking on his teeth and got listed for the top ten wanted animals in the world, so then he felt wanted and went to go home and had nobody to go to, so he found the beer bottle he drunk out of and started pissing in it so he wouldn't die and loved it. So then someone saw him in the bushes pissing in a beer bottle then drinking, so the person who saw him started recording and posted it on YouTube, and the boy became famous, so now he can feel like he was wanted in life after daddy went to go get the milk, then the little boy became really rich.

Whenever I’m bored, I hit up my local orphanage and beat some of them up.

I mean honestly, what are they going to do, tell their parents? 😂😂

Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid.

Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime. Little Johnny always takes the nickel.

One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, “Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Don’t you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel’s bigger?”

Johnny grins and says, “Well, if I took the dime, they’d stop doing it, and so far I’ve made $20!”

How did two retarded people get ran over in one second?

They're my friends.

Danny's Chromebook, Charger in his eager hands, Power for his world.

Fingers click and type, Words flow with electric grace, Thoughts come to life.

Screen illuminates, Imagination takes flight, Limitless pages.

Infinite knowledge, Unleashed through digital realms, Chromebook charger's might.

Danny's trusted friend, Always ready to connect, Bound by cord and fate.

Together they thrive, Exploring vast horizons, Endless possibilities.

Danny with his Chromebook charger, A duo, unstoppable, Unleashing their dreams.

I asked someone why they were crying. They told me that they had to abort their twins.

Then someone yelled "DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE!"

Why can't dinosaurs clap? Because they're dead.

Why did the cops come over?

Because parents had kids in their basement.

What do the Twin Towers and murder victims have in common?

Both were owned by their own kind.

There are two kids sitting in a classroom: Lily and John. Lily sleeps in class every day.

The teacher asks Lily who made heaven and earth. John pokes her with a pencil. She shouts, "Jesus Christ Almighty!"

The teacher says, "That's right."

The teacher says the next day she asks the same question. John pokes her with a pencil. She shouts, "Jesus Christ Almighty!"

"That's right," the teacher says.

The next day she asks Lily what did Eve say to Adam after their 100th. John pokes her again. "If you stick that thing in me one more time, I'mma break it in half!" she shouts.

Why do men midgets laugh when they run?

Because their balls get tickled by the grass.

Okay, boys are known to measure their dicks, but do girls measure their depths?

Why do midgets laugh while they run?

The grass tickles their balls.

What makes Asians look like they're laughing at everyone? They're squinting before they hear the joke.

Why are half of the orphans blind? Because they can't find their parents.

Where do rabbits take baths and wash their asses?

Why do cows have bells?

Because their horns don’t work. 😂😂

If you're ever bored, beat up an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Why are most West Virginians going to hell?

Their favorite pastimes (inbreeding and bestiality) are an abomination unto the Lord.

My "parents" are so dumb. Who tf names their son "Lydia"?