A guy is bankrupt, so he gives his son a duck and tells him to go sell it for as much as he can. So the kid goes on the street to sell the duck. A prostitute walks by and says, "I'll f--ck you for $10." The boy says, "I would, but I don't have any money." She says, "Ok, I'll take the duck instead." He says, "Ok," so they go upstairs and f--ck. The prostitute says, "That's the best sex I've ever had. I'll give you the duck back, and we can do it again." So they do, and he gets the duck back. But when they go downstairs, the duck gets hit by a car. And the guy that hit the duck feels so bad that he gives the kid $25. So when he gets home, his father asks him why he looks so tired. The boy says, "Well, I got a f--ck for a duck, a duck for a f--ck, and $25 for a f--cked up f--ck."
The Street Jokes
Did you hear about the delivery boy that worked for that Italian Restaurant down the street?
Yeah, he Pasta-Way.
Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the street?
Because it got stuck in a crack :)
Me: Knock knock.
Some dude on the street: Who's there?
Me: Whowhowho.
Dude: Whowhowho who?
Whowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowho.
A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street, and they come to a kid playing in a sandbox. The priest says, "Hey, you wanna go screw that kid?"
To which the rabbi replies, "Out of what?"
Why did Paul Walker cross the street?
Because he wasn't wearing his seatbelt.
Someone was walking down the street and they saw some neat...
"Diarrhea cha cha cha, Diarrheal cha cha cha!"
Mr. and Mrs. Potato were walking down the street when a french fry caught the attention of Mr. Potato.
Mrs. Potato said: "I see you eye-balling that French girl!"
I was walking down the street and saw a kid slip on a plum.
I look to my right and died of laughter because I did the same!
I was walking down the street one day and I passed the gun store. I walked in and everything was half off. I didn't know back to school sales had started already.
Dead people can’t cross the street because they're dead, ha ha!
A German soldier is walking down the street during a hail storm when a lady suddenly falls over after being hit. He, along with a few others, walk over to her. One man asks, "What happened?" and the soldier replies, "Hail hit her."
Good sex sounds like a white man walking across the street with flip-flops on.
Two atoms are walking down the street, and they run into each other. One says to the other, "Are you all right?" "No, I lost an electron!" "Are you sure?" "Yeah, I’m positive!"
