The Devil jokes
A boy named Jimmy was riding to Hell to save his brothers and sister. That is the last place he pissed. There came across the Devil.
Part 1
Your mama is so ugly, she makes the devil cry.
Did you hear about the new Exorcist movie? The Devil came to get the Priest out of the child.
You are so ugly, when the devil saw you, he said, "Jesus Christ!"
If Satan is the devil, he's pretty sus.
To Drew the Devil,
We NEED to talk RN. I'm very mad at you, and we need to talk.
Angry Alex
Yo mama so old, on her birth certificate it said "expired."
Yo mama so fat, when she sat on a rainbow, Skittles popped out.
Yo mama so fat, when she sat on Walmart, the prices went down.
Yo mama so poor, she chases a garbage truck with a shopping list.
Yo mama so ugly, she made the devil go to church.
Satan and the devil are alter egos.
How do you make Holy Water?
Get regular water and boil the devil out of it.
A normal exorcism is getting a demon out of a person, but a reverse exorcism is the devil telling the priest to get out of the child.
Why did God make the devils die?
God is great!
What is a reverse exorcism? It is when the Devil tries to pull a priest out of a child.
My favorite toast for parties: May I be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows I'm dead.
Three people died and went to Hell. One of them is from America, the second guy is from Germany, and the third guy is from Afghanistan. The devil lets each person make a phone call to their loved ones in the country they came from, but they will be charged. The American spends 10 minutes on the phone and is charged $20. The German spends 12 minutes on the phone and is charged $24. The man from Afghanistan spends half an hour on the phone and is charged nothing. The other two guys asked the devil why. The devil responded: "Local calls are free."
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and the devil?
The devil always has horns... not just around children.
TJ's hairline so far back you still couldn't find it when the Devil was alive.
So the Devil decided to go to McDonald's and grab some lunch. What does he get?
A hot and spicy McChicken and three six-piece nuggets.
Ever heard of a reverse exorcism? It’s when the Devil tells the priest to exit the child’s body.
Yo momma so ugly, the Devil started going to church!
The reason why God and Jesus have eternal life and the power, aka (holy spirit) is to control us, take our free will, and our eternal life, which is our heaven. Our time!
Just to show up, in the nick of time for the second coming in full costume ready to judge us. Them spending a lifetime preparing their big speech, their excuse of them hiding this whole time.
Lol, Surprise!
Joke being on them.
As we all stand there and are there to judge them, doing what they said they were made for.
Taking our eternal life back from Satan and the Devil and sending them to their home they created themselves!
HELL!
P.S. With a little extra punishments!